Getting weighed

Well it should be easy you just stand there, and look at the dial, when I got to 18 stone I stopped getting weighed. Most domestic scales don't go over 20 stone, so once that limit is reached, it seems a pointless activity. I was fat and heavy, that was enough information for me. At the clinic they use a special scale you sit on. Sort of like a moulded plastic chair seat on a trolley with two stirrups for you to rest your feet on. The act of just sitting on it humiliates, the room empty when I entered has now filled up with an assortment of bods to hear the final score. To make it really mean they are all behind you, but you can hear them.
The scale reads out in 1. Kilograms - to several decimal places, ok if you are under 18 years of age and/or continental. 2. Pounds - Fine if you are American or can divide by 14. 3. Stones and pounds, what some might call legacy units, but these are the only ones I understand. Gail handles this sensitively and writes down my score in kg on a piece of paper, and discretely hands it to me. I assume its her phone number and thank her but politely decline her kind offer. Gails successors are not always as kind and several times my weight has been shouted aloud through the diabetes department. Then back to the waiting area, to save time you are called for the weigh in in twos or threes, it also guarantees there will be someone else to share the embarrassment. The Doc explains the procedure in this clinic, I can't remember most of it because I am trying to multiply by 2.2 and divide by 14.Next I end up in front of this lady who introduces herself as the dietitian........