The day starts fairly normally. Jean has got up early dropped Ally at school then bagged a lift. I take advantage of a lie in - good move. Digestion fine after last nights Masterchef. Chill out then off to mums for lunch. Ok so far Bank then Morrisons looking good. Minimalist shop at Morrisons saving up for a double whammy double points extavaganza at Tesco.
Then drop Mum off at home, gnawing pain, say hello to sis pain gets worse.
Generalised abdo pain radiating to back creasing me double by Speke road. Excruciating by Ford Road. In bulk by M57. Not good pick Jean up at Ennerdale which is not the lovely Wild valley. But some care home gaff at the back of beyond on the Aintree site a fine place but their website aint well today. A whole page of ASP net errors dont look good to me.
Then off to Jimmys gaff aka Rice Lane Motors to exchange cash for car. See Mr RLM a real Swiss sort of guy. Says to Jean (in uniform - so your the nursing trade then are you) red rag to bull stuff. I'm in pain and out of there. Off home. In bulk down Queens drive - consider chucking me guts but decide agin it.
Get home go straight to bed. I am now in agony off-ish! Help - Jeans lays hand on fevered brow, I assume foetal position and belch repeatedly. This is not good Houston we have a problem. The pain is identical in charcter, identity and onset to the stuff just before I had me belly cut the last time. I wait round writhing for hours. Manage to conact consultant and leave message at GP. Consultant says go to A&E and I'll see you when I get back. Ok pack bag Jean and Ally upset me not best pleased. This aint good mortality flashing before me big time - oh dear. Just at the end of the M62 the pain goes - just as quickly as it come turn round. No pint going to A&E c/o "I had a pain an hour ago" Frank (GP not barber) rings at 7.30 fizzy water (why fizzy)and if you are "farting" all is well. Well unusually chuff gas not present for this boy. Then at 11.30 - a hoomer - the seismic reaction woke Jean and caused ally to smile relief.
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