A Christmas Smile

Blog comments

Three in last 5 posts thats impressive - find it touching to know that some people are enjoying the chronicle and and find it stimulating. Will write more in 2007 - but only if people comment more. Tonight I am tesco shoppping blogging and doing some photographs. Guts are sore through eating chocolate. Chocolate makes me fart.

I am totally disrientated too my calender tells me it is saturday 30th December sure as hell dont feel that way.

Happy Christmas from Sue

Nannas Dog

Rabbits in the dog house.

Since the fence blew down we have taken to bringing the rabbit into the house to warm him give him a change of air and get him used to being held etc.

Regular readers will know of the boys enthusiasm in the hip department. But last night he excelled himself. Sat on my lap mostly innocently (ie no thrusting of any type) he seemed content. After I put him back in the hutch - I should have been suspicious when the first thing he did was light a fag but no.

I strolled into the living room whats that on the floor says I, looks like cold tea. Odd cause I was drinking diet coke. In a moment I had whipped out some quilted kitchen roll (extra absorbent) and scooped the offending stain up - as I proffered to my nose I realised this was a mistake it was pungent and had an animal air. Obviously Shakespeares boy juice. Interesting I thought how did he transmit it there whilst leaving me unsullied. It was at that point that my wife and I noticed what can only be described as bilateral soiling on my legs just below the knee. I removed my kecks in a thrice andthe rest of my togs on the way up the stairs. All bundled into a pile and given the straight in the washer treatment. Dirty little fecker - not impressed.

Bloggers gone to sleep

Or is it the blackberry. I wanted to check where I am up to but can't get on. Today is me dads birthday he would have been 85. I would usually mark it with a glass of something. For now I will celebrate 4 months sobriety (29th August).
Yesterday george and ann (niece and goddaughter) came up from the smoke. We had a larf at me mams. Top stuff brother was missing (get in touch if you read this).
Played a chocolate deal or no deal game. Hampered by george (the banker) never having seen it. Still a hoot. Went to tesco then enjoyed Dracula on beeb 1.

Boxing Day

Sod all traditionally in the am, ally gets up real late I have disturbed sleep. i the evening off for Tea at Ruth and Pauls. Good family evening.

Christmas Day

Started way to soon - hand up a birds bum armed only with a lemon and an onion. It cooked well and tasted good as did the beef.

Nipped to Ruth and Pauls for some pre dinner drinks and present exchange.

Dinner was a success I think and mum kept still and seemed to enjoy it

she was chuffed with the pressies.

Me mam

May end up being posted twice

Merry Christmas from me

In the toon army Christmas hat.

So here it is.....

Merry Christmas to both of my readers. What a year - I cant remember half of it but I am still here and I have some coils in my noggin. I have made a lifestyle choice to be sober and for today I have achieved it (since end of August). Christmas seems a challenging time to me - but will an interesting one not stuffing the turkeys bum with a hangover (think I will use paxo this year).

Been a rollercoaster year with real peaks and troughs - but the medication has kept me fairly stable and the self management and lifestyle stuff has helped.

Heres to a good 2007 - and if anybody does read this - feel free to comment - it would be an encouragement to the author. Lord knows I need it as I have a book to write this year (thats a 1000 words a week). Still the blog has been flowing more and my plan is written and the idea sold to a publisher which is a big issue for a lot of wordsmiths. I have a lot of sorting to do in the coming year and making progress towards contentment.

Anyway all the best and an apple in your ear (as my father in law used to say.

Twas Christmas Eve in the Workhouse

A peaceful day and the back ache which had troubled me has subsided. Most preparations underway for calorie fest tomorrow. Beef and Turkey forming the protein with spuds for carbs, carrots sprouts and peas and winter roast veg. Pavlova and christmas pud for afters. Tonic water for me.

Watch the end of apollo 13 on the box. Jean goes visiting cousins I wrap pressies Ally out with her cousin Hannah at Damons in speke.  Not my sort of gaff but I stay in and feel guilty that I havent bought Jean enough presents - Ally made the feeling worse by telling me Jean had got me loads. Off to a meeting tonight gonna pop into me mas on the way. Got some M&S belgian chocolate biccies off Eleanor and eat too many. Check out the christmas cards - good news from Sandra and Mike (and Orlaith) she is expecting again. She pops in the blog now and again. I shall where my toonarmy christmas hat tomorrow in her honour.

Feeling kind of Humbug

I know its me, I feel unable to enter into any of the faux merriment that is all pervading at this time of year. I will confess to getting secondary gratification from Allys delight when she was small and small kids wonderment in general. But for me - Christmas Sucks. I am sick of Oliver Ramsay Lawson and even Gary Rhodes having their hand up a turkeys arse. I am sick of Asda, Tesco, Sainsburys et al telling me to be finest, taste the difference or whatever crap. Ally wants cheese on toast for christmas lunch. I am kind of heading that way. Still not sure how many we are having though by my shopping if a company of Gurkha rifles turn up I should be able to feed them till August.
I am essentially an ungrateful miserable lazy sod, blessed with a face the resting posture of which is abject misery, I abhor the Christmas doo. Work closed yesterday and I shouted bye with the minimum of fuss. I dropped Lesley off in Crosby and scooted to Formby Tesco - one posh gaff that. The yoof on the coffee till proffered a mince pie I said i dont like Christmas ......I was going to say fayre but the tosser cut me offand barefacedly accused me of not liking Christmas -I confessed said I liked him even less. Tosspot. Still the blow was softened by a vienesse butter finger.
Overwhelmed by the politeness of the people in Formby if you bumped into them they said sorry smiled and wished you merry christmas. This just did for me I started driving my trolley like Ayrton Senna on speed. The grumpier I got the nicer they got - smug gits. Interetingly a range of products not available in our local stores just in case we thought we were worthy. Which of course we are not.
Bah Humbug
Cheered my self up reading this My Miserable Christmas

New Blogger

They heard me beefing yesterday and as a result I am on the new blogger. I dont know if I am ready to change my template etc but I am headed that way.

Chanukah

I forgot to say the post was prompted by picking up a leaflet in Tesco. It explained about the Maccabites and the Menorah and how to "do"Chanukah. Me its Friday Morrning I am off into work to sort a few loose end telephone calls etc.

From a roof in Queens New York

Up on the roof 

Eeyore and friend

I feel like Eeyore some times 

Happy chanukah

Thursday am spent waiting for the Telewest. He eventually arrives and swaps out thr box. 4th one he has had to do sinced the national problems on Saturday. I nip to take hannahb's present round and end up picking ally up and dropping her off. Hen its off to take me mam for a day out. I opt for new brighton. Imagine morecambe with the beating heart and pizzaz ripped out. One arcade a chippy and a cafe cling to the promenade in defiance of the developers. It is undoubtedly shit. It would be better as a Morrisons toilet as well as smelling better and being better cared for. Anyway its cheap even if its not cheerful. Big crash and traffic jam at the fiveways and busy town centre make me choose a dodgy cabby route home. Once again I am gutted that I haven't got a camera with me. The gulls, the caff the girls serving with santa hats and lacking christmas spirit. Best of all was a beautifully warm sunset.
Bad news playing with my camera last night. I have a dusty sensor. It says its easy if you are steady handed. I may ask David to do mine. As an enthusiast he probably has dusted his own and his hand is steadier than mine. Even if he hasn't I am sure he would have a go. So now, sat in tesco bit of blogging a,d a coffee. Girls out shopping I shall arse with camera after a bit of shopping.

I notice Kieran has been upgraded to the new blogger which is good but I aint. Grrrrrr.

SPAM the official UK web site

SPAM the official UK web site SPAM fritters - yes I know I shouldnt have but I did - I have this urge to try one with brown sauce - odd coz I dont like brown sauce.

Wednesday

Monday didn't do much tuesday went to work and had christmas dinner. Embarrassed by christmas cards. Done three meetings. Inspired as ever and realisation about childhood comes home. Been to see peter k my psychologist this am. Top bloke says I am doing well. Feel like I have made progress on the bipolar front this year. Settled on meds coped with crap and only a couple of blips. The challenge of sobriety at christmas looms large. I feel certain it will be helped by the driving licence. I suspect this may be my first christmasw sans booze since about the age of 6. I can remember how in the monochrome 60's colour was injected at christmas. Babycham pony calypso snowballs glace cherry watneys red and bullseye brown. Even the tot glasses my mum served the booze in were swirling patterns of orqange and violet and blue and yellow. I think ruby port and lemon was my first drink. We had a decanter. More for visual effect than port sieving reasons. Other names that were evocative of the season cherry B whiskey mac green ginger wine then there was all the weird coloured drinks that now form the basis of cocktails. Blue curacao, green creme de menthe (as favoured by the pope). My mum has always sought a liquer that she enjoyed de kuyper ammaretto tia maria drambuie shandy,

Online/Telephone Meetings

Online/Telephone Meetings Look at the bird image - someone once sent it to me on a card (or something very similar) I must try to find a better copy.

Christmas Night out - a photoset on Flickr

Christmas Night out - a photoset on Flickr

Canon PowerShot G5 Digital Camera Review: Intro and Highlights

Canon PowerShot G5 Digital Camera Review: Intro and Highlights Another review of the adorably funky Canon G5

Sat in the vet

While shakey boy gets seen. I have just hoofed it to the iceland and the pharmacy for me chrimbo pills. Let me explain how paranoid I can be. On the way out of iceland I remember there is a script for jean for which I pay. I think that I have taken her pills away from the chemist without paying in the past. I sweat and get palpitations I feel the need to confess to the ppa in newcastle. Then I get to craig and erics and I am relieved they have separated the pills and ashe has a little bag with money owing written on it. I have a binbag with mad man season ticket written on it. Nice. :-).
Lunched at abbey sefton with lesley extremely pleasant. I enjoy driving.

Thursday night Friday morning.

Turned up at support group expecting not many and pleasantly surprised. Small numbers but mighty strong positive vibes. A new member always good to see. A christmas gift from someone too - I was touched. Home sees us sitting down in front of the telly me with chilled tonic and lemon and the girls with some pink fizz.
Off to bed and I wake up late. Ring mum lesley mary and off for lunch with lesley. See noreen and ann. Then off for motorway drive to speke. See new morrisons getting built. Or Speke district centre as its called. Will bring long overdue produce to people of speke. Into wh smith and Borders. Sit reading mags and supping triple americano with a nice relaxed feeling.

PowerShot G5 Index

PowerShot G5 Index will need this soon. By the way I can legaly drive from midnight - hee hee. DVLA gave me the thumbs up result.

Wednesday filming

Did some stuff for Trevor McDonalds Tonight programme to go out on the 8th jan or there abouts. Presenter was Ricky Grover a top bloke stand up comedian actor and writer will look his website up. Got home and was v tired had a kip rang dvla licence received. Then it was off to St Hildas to watch Daisy pulls it off. Ally and Jess were doing stage management and had put heaps of work into it. It was good.

Edvard Munch - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Edvard Munch - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Happy Birthday Eddie - fellow Bipolar Boy

Thought I had posted this already

Musn't have worked. 

Back in the saddle

Well very part time - protected work - 8 hours per week. Did thursday and friday was whacked did next to nothing at the weekend. Worked on Monday - Elm Hall drive meeting in the pm. Tuesday bus to town pasty on cold cathedral crypt steps. A classic building in its own right the crypt is recommended for anyone interested in brickwork. Nice bit of the cathedral Here . Always had a soft spot for the wigwam and crypt - I remember the tower cranes when they were building it ( I must have been  around 4-5).

After the meeting over to the Whelan building number 11 on the precinct plan. A brisk cold walk back to the 86 bus top by the Phil and then a bus to Penny Lane pop in to see Adele at Tony Salivas airdressers. Seems to be too many tourists at Penny lane - these lads look south american.

Scary House by Jeans Mums

 

Adobe Photoshop CS2 Classroom in a Book - $34.99

Adobe Photoshop CS2 Classroom in a Book - $34.99 What I am working through at the minute to be a better post image manipulator.

Canon PowerShot G5 Review: 1. Introduction: Digital Photography Review

Canon PowerShot G5 Review: 1. Introduction: Digital Photography Review Eventually snapped up one of these on e-bay. Needed a compact that was versatile - this is the dude - 5 meg full manual and RAW settings. Coolio

Adobe Bridge and Fickr

DesignGeek 51: New Source for Bridge Tips, Use Flickr for Off-Site Image Archiving, Find Fonts Used in InDesign Style Sheets; InCopy/InDesign Workshop in May
May not look very sexy but its important to me (sad I know).

exactitude.nl

exactitude.nl

Festive Cheer

At the German market 

Wednesday morning

Great group in North East. I wasn't sure if I was in wqashington sunderland gateshead or newcastle but I arrived. It was newcastle caught a meal at rthe taipan. Shanghai fried dumplings (3) and some duck and rice. Duck cooked go perfection I thought. Got a taxi with the maddest hackney driver in the toon. He installed a sat nav as he was driving and somehow we found our way to bupa washington. Joanne does sterling there and full respect for that. I was latebut I did my best. At the end of my talk they gave me a toon army hat with bells on which I believe is the local team. I got a lift of a lovely lady called ursula to my billet at the A1(M) northbound washington services travellodge. Got my key wewnt to garage and watched ramsay transforming morgans in woolton. Night night

Blogger by email

Not working it would seem. A train and coffee post extolling the virtues of head moisturiser and yorkshire goes adrift in cyberspace. Though it can't be my blackberry because several catch ups get thro. I text jane dva and commisserate that she is off to join the barmy army next week.

Holiday Inn Express

Thats why it was cold , the vent was taped over. 

Saturday and Sunday

Committee meeting so I am off to nottingham central trains. Uneventual journey. Arrived in good time to a barely unrecognised Jackie. My how people change in this game. Useful meet sort out some practical stuff. Steak sandwich for lunch and surreal experience of christmas dinner on a night when the mgowners club seem to be having their annual bash. 300 couples in evening dress me in boots and scruffy kecks. Trot home to holiday inn express where we are staying. I manage to walk through a mile of mud and vegetation -n pitch black and howling wind. When I arrive I discover I have been walking paralell to a gravelled path. Doh. Lousy sleep turning things over. No heating in hotel bad wind outside and in. Late almost missed breakfast amid other residents complaining. Get nice volvo taxi to nottingham grab americano then train home. Girls are out for lunch. I will pick up a pie at m+s at the station.

On return from docs

Ally and I have a serious father daughter conversation. That'll do for this year we resolve. Nannas christmas gift arrives and we are impressed. Out to Beas and home to prep for tomorrows meet. Fall asleep watching nigella lawson last memory is her chopping a chorizio in her dressing gown.

Friday reflection

I cruise along to see Frank. As ever he dispenses wise words good medicines pills and sicknotes. Hope I mentioned I am back on the benefit. My self employed plan was pie in the sky. It was getting too stressful in october Lord help me by year end. I resolve to return to permitted work at a very gradual exposure. After Franks I trip to see Nanna who seems on good form. The dog too now on super vits seems lively. Frank tells me tramodol is a mood suppressant maybe why I feel like pants at the moment. Resolve to cut down tramdol substituting the codeine where required. Need to tart back at the gym too.

On the way

After picking up tickets from the fastticket machines (hiddenaway in the virgin office on platform 7 I am away onn the 8.52 to nottingham on time jolly dee.

jamesjlee

jamesjlee Some breathtaking reportage from the warzone from this embedded photojournalist.

County Asylums

County Asylums Some memories on these pages. Really where I grew up - 18-22 the catholic chapel ws the view from my bedroom window.

Me helping the constabulary

On Broadway actually 

Its Actually a service centre

Not a post office 

Copperas Hill Post Office Car Park

Where mail to the charity comes - and I or me mam colect it.

PS

Forgot to mention on Thursday I scored the charity post and a bowl of scouse in the mission cafe.
Notes must write to college, publisher, do some e christmas cards and get my B12 done. Also got some photos from yesterday to load.

PS

Forgot to mention on Thursday I scored the charity post and a bowl of scouse in the mission cafe.
Notes must write to college, publisher, do some e christmas cards and get my B12 done. Also got some photos from yesterday to load.

Wednesday Thursday Friday

Headaches no licence low mood. Thursday sees some productivity and I bang out the annual report of the charity. Also spend the afternoon in a back and forth with an interesting bloke from the website. Real youngster and highly skilled in photoshop. He thinks some of my photos are really good. Friday I arrive slightly late to see Frank (buses) he is sporting a new hair gel look. He advises me to cut the tramodol and together we knock together a plan he wants to see me in 2 weeks. Settle myself into not getting licence back till new year and coping with sobriety in that period. Tough but not as tough as some have it at this time of year. Got some prep to do for Saturdays meeting and I am planning to head off to Newcastle on Tuesday for their meet. Hoping the social will let me start some permitted work ASAP as I am missing the social element.

Tis the seaon to make money

Humbug. The local tesco has its marquee on the car park a sign that mr leahy and his helpers will help us part with pounds. I have 35 squid in vouchers so may use them tonight for starting the traditional christmas stash of goodies. All highly calorific, intoxicating or both. Need to get my flue swept as well (the chimney). Santa will struggle in the current passage.
Top news - singing jimmy the trolley stacker at tesco has done away with his combover. It was so good I never realised he was bald. Why do bloks bother with a combover especially where their occupation involves working in the wind. Bobby chqarlton what did you start?

Flash Photography with Canon EOS Cameras - Part I.

Flash Photography with Canon EOS Cameras - Part I. Excellent article - just need to experiment now.

Tuesday was lazy

After getting up late and not doing much i eventually get it together. Still drawing a big negative at DVLA - damn them and not doing much better at David LloyD(long story).

Take rabbit to the vet where both shakespeare and I forget to ask the vet for a jab - I guess I am more culpable than him. Then after lasagne (finest) its off to Ruth and Pauls. Pauls new Chrimbo pressie has arrived Canon PowerShot S3 IS initial impressions are its small heavy and multi functioned. It has a whopping zoom and image stabilisation but I still think I prefer the SLR road. Well for me anyway. I have got the pocket Lumix and that does me - only down side is it doesnt shot in much past auto but it seems to cope. Complete the first part of my photographic presents christmas order and st up part two. Hope it works. The rest of Christmas shopping needs some thought as well.

Wednesday sees  me up at 8.45 and hopefully out for a long delayed lunch with Kim. We shall see.

Monday Evening

Went to a meeting at Elm Hall Drive Phils home group. Good to conNect with new people and a lively sense of warmth and laughter in the group. Came back knakkered, rang Mickey sorted out a night out for 9th December, and had a bizarre nights sleep in which I dream i out a helluva bender wake up hungover and knakkered. Drift off back to sleep eentually and snooze intermittently till 2.15.

Monday a Canon kinda day

New Flashgun courtesy of Ebay and new Canon Off shoe camera cord (2) and my subscription to EOS magazine. Happy days (camera wise at least). DVLA continue to hack me off with their insistence that neither of the two faxes or the letter have arrived. Given a new fax number. On the positive side I purchase two new wee roasting tins, and do the post run. Recovery continues and I prepare a nicely stuffed bir. Lemon garlic and onion.

Crawford & Crawford Veterinary Surgeons

Crawford & Crawford Veterinary Surgeons Our Vets Shakey has an apppointment there tomorrow for 5.30 to get a bunny jab and sort his eye out.
Lady from Tonight programme rang when I was on the phone but hasn't rang back yet.

Waste time with new blogging add on

The fact I use Itunes is irritating the life out of it. DVLA computer is down. I have renewed my prescription season ticket and I am dressed before 12. Need to go to post office and post letters we did last night. Allerton Road - need rabbit hutch disinfectant and streaky recipe (no its not a freaky recipe). Intend to be a small roasting tin and some chipolatas for Ally who was most complimentary about them yesterday. Must ring the counsellor who I cancelled when i come out of hospital and rebook in. England get stuffed down under (glad I didnt go now). Start thinking what i need to do for Christmas gifts .

Pic from Flickr

That was easy and seems kind of funky to use. I have seen my arse with Picasa since the latest beta upgrade rogered my antivirus settings. Need to review the weekend.

Saturday didnt do much saw mama and shared a ham shank with sue the dog she loved the bone. I think I tok a picture or two.

Sunday i rose late and busied myself i the garden  fun watching the rabbit gambol around the garden. He truly loves someone else being in there with him - he is inquisitive in the extreme.

Sunday night I get hacked off with Blueyonder for messing me about. Jean helps me sort out financial work post etc.

Monday sort Prepayment certificate for prescriptions 95 quid but good value.

Trying New Software

Always keen for something free and that integrates packages I have gone for Windows Live Writer - the main thing being it seems able to add a flickr image direc to blogger (in theory).

National Museums Liverpool Blog

National Museums Liverpool Blog Some good stuff here.

The Past from Above: Through the lens of Georg Gerster

The Past from Above: Through the lens of Georg Gerster got to go see this too.

National Museums Liverpool's Assembling the Lutyens cathedral model slideshow on Flickr

National Museums Liverpool's Assembling the Lutyens cathedral model slideshow on Flickr must go and see this exhibition.

In case you were interested

Steak mushroom and onion baguette. Delicious. In hampers allerton road. It is my lunch venue of choice. (On Allerton Road). Got to do bloody rabbit when I get in. Last night was good apart from gagging for a pint. I have a strong association with support group and ale. As I pay for the room I talk to mehmet the barman. Beer makes a man fat and foolish. I am better off he tells me. He is of course correct. We fall asleep watching rthe cricket.

Liverpool meet.

New chest and tum on display for 2 members. Both proudly showinhg their surgeons work. I feel for our speaker Jenny Hughes who dopes an excellent job and manages to control the unruly mob. Couple of new faces too and I wonder if they will be back. Noreens funding has been approved and sasha has it confirmed that she's a rny not a band. I get three volunteers for the tender evaluation exercise for simon banks all fiesty women. Anyway lunch is here so I will resume later.

Thursday in the am

Spent the morning on the phone here and there. Vineeta, doctors work (maria) lesley and dvla among others. Ally on an inset day and off to town. Me needing important provisions eg food and rabbit sawdust disinfectant etc. Still working on photoshop.

Boy II

 

Da boy

 

Jobcentre Plus - Working Age Benefits Incapacity Benefit

Jobcentre Plus - Working Age Benefits Incapacity Benefit

0151-801-8000 Belle Vale Jobbie
0845-6008196 Garston Jobbie (no records of the conversation I had with the geezer).

Wednesday or is it Thursday.

Off to see peter kinderman who as ever is a great steadying source of wisdom. We discuss the (my) bipolar personality at length. Spend some useful time reflecting how far I have come. The last 5 years haven't been easy. For anyone. Armed with my costa coffee I blend in to the student scene (cept they all seem to be eating pasties). Home via number 14 bus which goes to Runcorn. Its throwing it down but my M+S coat let's it drip off. Its sort of teflon coated which means a drop sits there 5 minutes before soaking in. More aesthetic than waterproof. Not just wet but M+S piss wet through.

Convalescent boy

Not doing much - bored beyond belief - spending my time doing a little bit of structured activity then a rest then a play. play is mostly photoshop related. Its a powerful tool but enjoyable to use. Spoke to Kieran and Kim today. Seeing Peter tomorrow and must book in with Frank. Got some personal finance issues to sort too. Christmas is fast approaching. I need to hassle DVLA again tomorrow, they have Franks letter and my plan is to be out driving on Thursday - ever the optimist. Weather forecast is not brilliant with gales and crap forecast. http://http://www.flickr.com/photos/kenclareblog/sets/72157594386009763/ is buskers and http://www.flickr.com/photos/kenclareblog/sets/72157594384670879/ is photoshop lesson 1.
I am enjoying it. Though it is such a powerful tool it is hard to control its use.

A lack of blogging

I have mostly been asleep -or at least relaxing. Didnt realise how tired one body could be. Spent most of the week chilling. Had to catchup with some essentials but havent achieved anything major. A bit fed up of people telling me I am doing too much and need to slow down - I know they are right which makes it even worse. Was glad to get out of Fazakerley with all limbs intact only side effect being ascabby bit from lumbar puncture - a process I dont want to repeat ina hurry. Friday sees us taking a walk down the dock and snapping away like a tourist. I get home and discover the curves control and the 350D RAW add on for photoshop. Something to wind the long hours and quiet days away. I resolve to learn more about photoshop whilst recovering, I havent a bloody clue if truth be told digital image manipulation is up there with DTP for me things that take too long that are best left to experts. Armed with photoshop cs2 for dummies and some DVD's I am determined to have a go. Yesterday we lunched at the Tate cafe the potted beef was tremendous.
Got a letter from Frank this am he is pursuing the DVLA to reinstate my non epileptic and driving status. Will chase next week. Set up some task management software for the website - feels like an achievement. Hope I am not heading on a downward swing, but I find Children in Need Friday always signals a seasonal low for me. Titheads dressed like a bear doing stupid things for charidee distresses me. I avoided TV and shopping as best I could yesterday. Should be our lunch but Ruth and Paul doing it because I was ill. Mum rings every day - I think she is worried about me.

Tate and Photoshop

 

Big Boy on Acid

 

My kind of sign

 

Me being a toursit

Down at the Albert Dock 

souvenirs - a photoset on Flickr

souvenirs - a photoset on Flickr An impressive set.

Monday goes on

Nil of note in the afternoon. Jean and Ally visit in the pm. The intermittent bells of the fire alarm drive me barking. I am joined by the delightful Tommy 94 years old deaf as a post but deeply funny with it. A more pleasant man you couldn't hope to meet. Watch spooks thro the distance but struggle. Another cock up with prescribed medicine and I am forced to improvise. Crap nights kip needed pills at 5.20. Disturbed frequently.
See consultant dr clarke. A lovely lady who also owns a canon EOS 350D. She is thorough and starts me on an ACE inhibitor. I get a leaflet. One of the side effects is lack of taste I does that mean I start laughing at tittybangbang.

Bay cont.

Add in a copuple of supporting od guys in supporting roles. One lloked like frankie howerd with myasthenia gravis, the other private godfrey from dads army. There was a superstar whop kept fitting in the corner but we had him moved. The staff were good in parts. I would like to blame it all on demoralisation cutbacks and trust status. In reality I can't the standards shock me at times. The inability of an HCO to provide three squares and six cups of tea a day disturbs me. Tempted to write off to the nursing standard and the grauniad. I am told at 9 that I will be transferred to the heart assment clinic. I eventually am at 11.45 I pass the drinks trolley on the way out. First one since tea time I note. The HAC has an old soldier who wants to regale me with tales. I negotiate pills with nurse and end up with good kip after two tramodol and painkillers. HAC seems altogether better. I am visited by Lesley from work who doesn't wake me but leaves a note. Her and Maria pop in at lunch time. Jean at afternoon visiting. Seems I am in another night. Feel tired, and sore.

The bay

Opposite cyril is the man he calls the ewandering avenger. He basically seems confused but only as far as the bog. He spends ages on there. Cyril thinks this is to piss him off, he has had a double dose of picolax and wants to crap large explosive watery stools every half hour. Nest to WA is a man who doesn't do much, next to him is a man with a chest infection, who maybe has had a a stroke. Poor geezer needs help keeps ripping his oxygen mask off and shouting for a drink. I try to sit him up as best I can. I can't ignore his crys (and I can still hear him with the volume on the telly at max). Net to me is frank who has been sleeping rough since monday he has a chest infection fearsome tremors and the scared rabbit look of a man on detox.

Cyril and other men

How I wish I had my camera some consent forms and a dictaphone the bay had the makings of a photojournalistic essay. 6 men all with great faces.
Cyril military man since 1935. He joined for 7 years, saw action in the afghan border( his opinion shit then shit now). 1942 with the WW2 in full swing he staywd for burma italy normandy. A tough guy with a heap of laughs. He is staring down the barrel of concern and though he realises he has to die I get the feeling he thinks not this not yet.

Headache bad friday

Then attend Allys prizegiving at the anglican cathedral. First time I have been and incredibly proud to see ally take the year 11 re prize. Got home and flopped into bed. Saturday morning we decide to head to fazakerley a+e. Get seen fairly quickly and head towards the clinical decisiopn makiong unit and into MAU. Medical assessment unit. In bed adjacent to cyril an 89 yearold v eteran of the north western front.

Headache bad friday

Then attend Allys prizegiving at the anglican cathedral. First time I have been and incredibly proud to see ally take the year 11 re prize. Got home and flopped into bed. Saturday morning we decide to head to fazakerley a+e. Get seen fairly quickly and head towards the clinical decisiopn makiong unit and into MAU. Medical assessment unit. In bed adjacent to cyril an 89 yearold v eteran of the north western front.

A busy few days.

Arsenal beat the blues 1-0 we had a great night with an exciting 1st half but a bastard ref and a daft goal did for us. I was off Thursday and mooched about. Picked up car at luch together with jean and new star drive or something. I am 400 quid lighter. It got worse 400 quid more at the mot station then 135 at the post office for tax. Grr still can't drive it either. Bad headaches for two days.

I don't wanna be elected.

I may be rationalising but I decided the knockback from the ASO committee was a good thing. Truth is I am stretched painfully thin in parts, its a committment I can do without. Saw Peter Kinderman in the morning which after a nightmarish 79 journey and a cup of costa coffee I was awake. A good session with him then off to Aintree for a bariatric meeting in the sefton suite. Back home ally off sick with a headache and I am off shooting RAW format in the park. I even enjoy some post image manipulation. I could wax lyrical about RAWs 5 stop exposure flexibilty or its brilliant colour control but I doubt anyone save me is interested. Food then off to a meeting home and early night prior to another early start with maureen the CIC counsellor. Football at goodison tonight we are off to see the toffees play the gunners in a carling cup match. We are signed up for the beer and chilli night in the marquee. I get a hot meal coffee and a chance to waste some money betting on ther outcome of a game I know nothing about. Got up late this mornin and feel rough as a bears bum.

List of unusual personal names - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

List of unusual personal names - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Made me smile greatly especially the Zappa contribution - Yellow Snow!

Fw: I don't wanna be elected.

-----Original Message-----
From: "Ken Clare" <ken.clare@wlsinfo.org.uk>
Date: Wed, 8 Nov 2006 08:49:14
To:"Blogger" <kclare.kclare@blogger.com>
Subject: I don't wanna be elected.

I may be rationalising but I decided the knockback from the ASO committee was a good thing. Truth is I am stretched painfully thin in parts, its a committment I can do without. Saw Peter Kinderman in the morning which after a nightmarish 79 journey and a cup of costa coffee I was awake. A good session with him then off to Aintree for a bariatric meeting in the sefton suite. Back home ally off sick with a headache and I am off shooting RAW format in the park. I even enjoy some post image manipulation. I could wax lyrical about RAWs 5 stop exposure flexibilty or its brilliant colour control but I doubt anyone save me is interested. Food then off to a meeting home and early night prior to another early start with maureen the CIC counsellor. Football at goodison tonight we are off to see the toffees play the gunners in a carling cup match. We are signed up for the beer and chilli night in the marquee. I get a hot meal coffee and a chance to waste some money betting on ther outcome of a game I know nothing about. Got up late this mornin and feel rough as a bears bum.

Calderstones

Black and White Raw format 

Monday more brain numbing tests.

Off to see doctor holcroft more tests of this and that. Get upset and a bit angry about poor memory performanced. My noggin is not as chipper as it was. Over to suitre through cunning staff only exit and a quick 4 preops to see for this week. Then todays lady understandably anxious preop. Quick bite of lunch (then set up mandy from huntleigh on the flowtron training). Run round like scalded cat doing notes take some calls and away for 3.30. Off to allerton road get beard trimmed at tony salivas. Then to tesco to shop. Forgot to mention that lauren next door had her rabbit pop its clogs last week. Shakespeare scored some food.

Reflection on a week

I hate having to catch up.
Did up to Tuesday.

Wednesday - work - went to walton saw neuro doc - bit of leakage round the coils he thought but radiologists report said ok. Been referrd to headache clinic and see in 1 year. OPD had thoughtfully placed 4 internet kiosks for free surfing whilst waiting
Thursday -work
Friday more work meal at Marys car picked up for clutch repair. Buy tickets for Everton ring tax and renew railcard

Saturday didnt do much meal outwith Brownes cancelled my sister had a car crash her and John ok but car not driveable. Old lady next door in hozzie.
Sunday ruth and pauls not much else to say.

Raw file

 

Angus McBean and Audrey

DSCF0093 on Flickr - Photo Sharing!

DSCF0093 on Flickr - Photo Sharing! Mick the H ead Thwaite spied on Flickr

86 to Tesco.

A hearty repast of curry and rice at the mission. Anns soul food. Trotted on to the bus two young smoking scalls. One with red horns and fishnets and a variety of hallowee'n regalia. She wishes me happy halloween. I wish I knew an appropriate wiccan response. Tempted to reply with may the seed of your loin be fruitful in the belly of your woman. (Tis a quote from neil off the young ones). On the bus a screaming woman and her screaming child are trying to outdo one another. She seems to have more of a problem than the kid to me. Need to purchase drain cleaner and other stuff.

Off to pick up post

Got up late, leisurely Tuesday am after a long monday. Started with the good doctor holcroft testing my head then moved on to the sefton suite phonecalls a bit of real mursing with a non bariatric patient then a new patient clinic with mr mc adam. Home late and spied the chief constable of merseyside observing pc's enforcing asbos on mischief night. BTW WTF is mischief night when did it start why did no one tell me. Watched spooks (same riproaring plot this time it war fundamentalist christians). Off to bed. Anyways back to today kim binned me off she's playing nurse to pete. So I am off to post office for charity mail. Will pop into the mission for me dinner all being well. Need tostart carrying me camera but wonder if I would have used it last night on chief con. I want a new coffee machine. Every now and again I get the fancyin for coffee. Perhaps save me dosh and stick to the costa/starbucks thing. Sat on this bus someone is wearing nannies perfume. Hers was characteristic old lady niff. To be honest I just thought she smelt that way. Its a kind of erau de toilette on homeless.

RTFM

My Macro lens delivers better magnification after I read the manual. 

Edge Lane Project | Liverpool Land Development Company | Home Page

Edge Lane Project Liverpool Land Development Company Home Page Went to Beas was amused to see a sign advertising this web site on Edge Lane.

Epileptic with a shattered clutch

Just about how I feel. RAC man tows Jean home - speak to nice RAC man about service policy and leave it all for tomorrow feel somewhat overwhelmed to be honest this may cost money I can ill afford - especially sticking in the craw as I have not been driving it.

I love my rabbit

 

Jean put the car in for MOT this am I had a lie in. We went out for lunch at the patio. Got the call from Ally halfway through that quote was ready. Didn't really settle or enjoy meal from that point. Rang from outside pub 300 notes. Bummer once again at car mans behest and feel vulnerable. Then its off to pick car and off to speke for storage solutions and essential b and q items. Heavy bummer on way home in that car breaks down and results in call to RAC. I don't know much about cars but it sounds like the clutch has gone. Here am I sat unhappilly banned from driving in a car with no MOT on double yellow lines. Sorry officer.

Filming Wednesday

Started off at Sefton Suite with a really great guy. I am always amazed at how willing people are to participate in the filming. I think everyone sees it as part of the helping others and getting the message across. It all goes well - one member of staff wanders into shot and doesnt want to be seen so we had to reshoot. Off then to our house where it goes less well. Erina had done some lines and I found it relly hard to put what I had experiencedinto someone elses words. The film crew dont feel it but I get emotional still every time I talk about where I was physically and mentally. Ring the DVLA - I am still Epileptic - and unhappy.

Tuesday evening

Nipped down to Sefton park - which would have been easier in my car did some pictures looked increasingly perv like stalking through the park at twilight. Quiet but satisfying support group which ended up with me drawing diagrams. Feel like I let people down as I guy who had emailed me ages ago finally caught up with me and I am embarrassed to admit I hadnt been back in touch. Several people arrive at the support group looking considerably lighter. Ally was off out to see the Puppini sisters at the carling academy. Good gig by all accounts.

'The 39 Steps' - e-Flyers

'The 39 Steps' - e-Flyers
Noticed in the Guardian.

Sefton Park in Autumn

 

I was happy till you called me epileptic

Thats what it says in the letter from the DVLA. So I cant drive - to say I am pissed off is an understatement. The nice lady tells me that my fits and my subarachnoid bleed were not related (according to the medical evidence she has). I text Frank to see if he can help - hes probably had enough after trying to sort out my mum this morning. Looks like she needs insulin to him referral to specialist diabetes nurse/ and then maybe the nephrology team. Happy days. Need to ring work see if its ok to get a taxi in again. I know its not life and death about the driving licence but it feels like it. Jeans off to work I had planned to take myself to the park with my camera for a macro session but the rains been beating down and the light is pooh. I cant be bothered. Anyway it will be of half term kids and worse still their grandads handing out bloody werthers.
As soon as I write that the sun peeks round the corner of a cloud. Should ring Mrs Mc Naught I owe her a call and need to mention the 2-0 defeat of the redshites on Sunday. Constipation still a problem and I have changed the pain killing medication in a bid to debung me. Knowing my luck I will get tothe park it will pee down and I'll need a dump. Think I will stop in and maybe have a kip - though taking to my bed seems like the act of a depressive. Alternatively I could be creative with software with photographs or make a serious start on the writing. Both of which activities could result in accusations of hypomanic swing. All I am clear about is my head is truly wedged up my own bum. Mindful I have the support group tonight and filming tomorrow - and work. Then 2 days off. Want to do some serious macro shooting - Jean will not be impressed for sure.
Thats blue sky - not much but some its windy - Hmm wonder what its like in the palm house to shoot. Could get down there early to do sunset if its nice.

In the barbers chair.

Well waiting to get into it. Adele is the hairdresser of choice alas Frank no more. I even jumped the bus down here as its easier. Feel knakkered as per usual. Car booked in for MOT thursday, mum booked in for hers at Franks 9.20 tomorrow. No filming tomorrow daytime/nighttime just wednesday am. Had a good morning this morning and extended to the pm. Still need gto make one call.

I know I am paranoid but.....

I dont mind spam emails offering me viagra, cialis, hair restorer growth forula but when I get email targetting me for online purchase of my prescription only medicine I get suspicious - is the NHS computer being hacked or are they just lucky.

Come dancing

Why I am I watching it. Cant be arsed not watching. They are assassinatingsome irl from casualty who I thought did well just walking in her shoes. Tis shite telly but I feel starngely engaged. I just read a chapter of a book called how to write a book which reveals it takes 24 x 10 hour working days to do 50000 words should take me about 4 years then. Feel like I am on a bit of a downward swing. Could be that someone commented yesterday that I was more reliable than people expected and Jean said I looked a bit low. Bloody feel unreliable and down now.
I used to look forward to come dancing on a friday night - I think it was peter west of pissed up cricketing fame. Good article in guardian weekend about noel edmonds deal no deal.
Macro lens came and a skylight filter I ordered a 350d instruction manual from ebay and immediatly my getting the most from book turns up. I break a piece of gaudi pottery I was photographin and lose my blob.

Tuesday October 17th

http://www.historymatters.org.uk/output/Page1.asp

Start the day with a mug of tea here http://www.livercm.org.uk/ in the city centre caff run by ann and her team if you pass go in. If you are lucky you may spy the early morning Cozzie who gives breakfast and ministry to people struggling.
Park in Mount Pleasant - not sure how long for so spend a fiver and its off to Lime street to meet Gill off the London train. Shes a publisher and we are meeting to discuss what I hope will be a book. She is the nicest possible publisher I could imagine, though I am not behind yet. We natter and lunch in the Marriot. Then its off to home feeling strange. Cook tea then off to a meeting. Some faces missing and one I must chase.

AGM

Saturday 14th - was a great event friends old and new. I am still whirring but it went well and the pics are here - http://www.flickr.com/photos/bigsteve2006/sets/72157594336044972/ and here http://www.flickr.com/photos/kenclareblog/sets/72157594331412708/ if you see yourself put your name on it.

Just when things are going well

Everything goes tits up. Phone call from a Doctor Reid. Mums potassium is up the swannee and she needs admitting. Ally tried to deflect the call (bless her) when she realised the gravity of the situation she dealt appropriately.

SocietyGuardian.co.uk | Society Guardian | The view from the blogosphere

SocietyGuardian.co.uk Society Guardian The view from the blogosphere

Thanks Kieran

Met with publisher

My publisher. Ha ha sounds so luvvyish. Went throiugh draft project plan/outline thing she is made up. Happy days. What a fine woman. We meet in lime street. I am concerned I may not recognise her. I'll be the woman in the red jacket she says. Yeah you and the rest of the virgin staff. So add author to skill set and cv. Just got to right the bloody thing now. No probs. Speak to one of my chapter writers today. No problem says he.

Observed in Lime Street