Sunday, May 21, 2006

OK its a fair cop

I have been a tad less than diligent in my keeping of a blog. Poor show I know but the web site migration has been a nightmare. My concentration sucks and problem solving about 40% so every thing takes longer and I am a grumpy old get.
Tuesday saw me down to the offices of Merseytravel to collect my concessionary travel pass. What a place, twas smelly and hot. The delicatesen ticket dispenser tells me I am 75 currently serving 51. I am such a patient waiter these days. When my number is called I trot up the nice lady speaks to me thro a treble glazed window and touches my letter with the bare tips of her fingers. I'll have to get your file she says. On return she adopts mentally ill person needs help best if I speak slowly approach. Do I have to renew asks I no its permanent says she does that mean I'll never get any better says I. She smiles uncomfortably I glare menacingly after all she knows I am a mean mad mofo. She then goes to show me my map and then tells me twice southport in the north, earlstown in the east, chester by rail only in the south and scheduled ferries. Not river cruises and ormskirk by rail only. She tells me I will need a new pass in two years and the the top tip is to keep my photos - I havent got any no problem for 3.50 I'll take some. Of we go I think at last human contact but no she pokes her camera through a hatch in the wall. Probably scared of a scally robbing it. It was polaroid doesnt she realise the scallies have gone digital. Ironically I took a taxi home. It was wet and I was knakkered.
In the afternoon I saw Frank ( the doctor) who as usual proves to be wise good and a healer, poor lad thinks doctor always knows bestthough.
Tuesday Bit of a strange day. A man rings the bell no man due I have checked my diary. Hello I am here to change your elecky meter you got a letter last week. No I didnt says I well it must have been in January and you forgot.
He looks genuine 60 plus he's called Frank so there is a place in my life for him. We chat amiably I tell about my SAH and BAD and weight loss surgery (lucky arent I). Hes interested met someone whose had all of em but never one person with the full house. In the middle of this a lady who I dont know says does Jean live here. Yes says I well Eleanor old lady next door isnt answering so I say I have got keys, I had been telling Frank about her so we tell nice lady to wait and we'll go in. Expecting the worse I tread cautiously the telly as ever is 1000 decibels she is sat happily watching flog it till two blokes appear and she bricks it.
Job takes about 20 minutes and I enjoyed the chat and break from the grunt work of migration. So he has a funky wireless PC handheld ruggedised to collect his data on. This is 104 he says nope says I its 102 - Are you sure ?? You have been really ill. He then says the eff word several times and curses whilst he reinstalls the meter.
He says your wife wont believeyou man changed meter but meter is the same oh how we laughed. Job done he shook hands in a friendly tight artisan grip. Bleeding hurt it did. he asks which is 104. I point him to PAuline and Johns. The bloody elecky aint working so I say hey Frank me eleckys not working - he comes back and sorts it.5 minutes the doorbell rings. Now what the computer as my next job he says. 102 he is clearly exaspereated. If you werent such a nice bloked I would have sodded off. I offer him a drink as he starts the job - no good says I eleckys off. we had a laff he goes again told him to pop in any time. 5 minutes the bell rings again. I go to the door Frank youare taking the piss now - the man from parcelforce looks puzzled.

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