Long time no write

Its been weeks since I properly wrote. As many scottish friends would say ma heids been mince. I guess the problem is the host of problems I have going on in the said "heid" my pre-morbid personality is cyclothymic, I have biipolar, for which I swig a cocktail of psychotropic drugs. I have some effects fropm the sub arachnoid in the right cerebral artery, but what's real what's imqgined and what's anxiety blend to decieve. I take a potent trilogy of analgesia to numb this pain in both head and wrist. My preferred anxiolytic is south african or french and deep dark red. That can't help. I have lost the ability to write with. What used to gushj effortlessly no needs squeezing. It feels like literary constipation, and the effort of forcing brings head pain. I need to write this I need to say it I need to face. I have assumed the ostrich like pose that always accompanies a problem. Its never worked in the past so why chase a losing formula.
The irony that if a patient or friend presentd in the current mess I find myself in I could suggest an action easily while I flap helplessly with arse in air is not lost on me. Peter Kinderman my clinical psychologist points me on the road. He is wise beyond his years.