Friday - No time to blog on Thursday

Missing a day is bad news - been so busy this week I feel almost normal.
So to break the missing bits into small chunks and chew slowly. Had a big meet at work Wednesday afternoon discussing how to snaffle someof the extra money that the NHS will be given after April to improve its computer systems. Problem is they made a list last week and it came to three times the dosh that is likely to be available. I worry that even if we get a lot we aint got many people about with the right skills. I am also concerned about the amount of endless peformance monitoring stuff we have to submit to the centre (whatever that means). Perhaps if we asked saddam, blair, bush and co to fill in all these returns it would prevent the meltdown in the Gulf. It seems to me that everyone is so busy filling this stuff in to monitor their performance that they aint got time to perform (which could be a good thing in the gulf). I am having those strange old feelings that I want to make a difference to health for real people and I guess that seems a long way away at the minute. Make jokes about chucking it all in and going to be a clinical person again. Something stirs deep inside about why I joined up as a nurse anyway, all those years ago. I manage to stop these delusional ideas affecting my performance at performance monitoring. Wednesday Night is quite poignant as we raise a glass to Peter, and talk about old times and friends who are no longer with us.
Thursday morning got to be at Aintree Hospitals to see Mr Kerrigan at the ungodly hour of 9.15. This will involve a trek up Queens drive, a main artery of liverpol, at rush hour which is not easy. I opt for light relief on the journey talking handsfree to John Mc, top primary care technician and all round good egg.I do miss working with him. Arrive handy at Aintree and secure a decent accessible parking space. Do a few phonecalls and prepare an agenda for the meeting with Mr K. Not sure but anticipate its to talk about websites, and support. Rather than matters personal. Correct in my assumption, and for two hours we cover huge areas. The man is a star, I have noticed this personality cult that weight Loss surgery people develop about their surgeons. When someone gives you a life back its hard not to look at them as some kind of saint. We discuss this at length, I hope I don't do this but my suggestion that I design Dave Kerrigan memorabilia and mechandise betrays me. He is impressed with the selling locks of his hair idea,though, think of the income generation potential. We discuss a vast range of things in a circuitous way and I feel like we are the same wavelength about quite a few things. Getting some professional help with the wlsinfo website which is good and looking at printed info for those people without t'internet. Though a lot of big people have internet access as it is an enabling tool, if you can afford it. Leave with lots of plans after 2 hours. Miss a meeting of the trainers and head straight for the matchworks spending oly 25 minutes on the rocket flyover because of roadworks, still a good chance to phone people. Arrive at Matchworks and some big prescribing team doo is on, not sure what it is but the lunch smells good. See Frank (GP not barber) another one of the Ken Clare support team who will be shortly enter the sainthood. Meet some other docs, some of whom are really encouraging about the weight loss, some of whom dont mention it (maybe they didn't notice). The event is run by Ali my heavily pregnant mate, I will miss her when she goes on Mat leave as she is sound and supportive to me. off to childwall to see Sam and the gang, what a great job she has done in my absence, though I still feel guilty about being away so long. Had a good natter with one of my staff who is in the TA about the stae of the gulf
Home to the girls and off to mums for her 73rd birthday, we bought her a groovy chick cake, some flowery things and bulbs. She is very difficult to buy for. See Sandra at Tescos we went in for a cake and a pint of milk and spend 35 quid.See brother Dave and his partner Maria at Mums. My sister Mary is off to the theatre in Manchester. BAck home a few phone calls, bit of surfing and its time for ER. A very moving (tear jerking) episode on E4.
Friday then, a meeting at the matchworks, then Eileens dads funeral and off to Leeds for an evening meeting. The weight loss support group for one of the two surgery centres in the city.A busy weekend ahead.

Wednesday AM

Popped into the Matchworks, Missed lunch (not good) had a good meeting with Caroline and Paul (my counterparts) between us we cover the whole of Liverpool. Had a natter with a few folk and sorted some stuff out. Popped into the library, saw Mo, Tracey and King Blogger. Realised that running a blog can afffect how you interact. People seem to know about the details of certain aspects of my life. They also get miffed if they dont get mentioned (sometimes). It feels a bit like a confessional sometime, and I am talking to myself, forgetting that there is a sad band of people peeping in to my equally sad life (several of whom just stormed out in a huff). I am worried I will let something thats supposed to be confidential, slip in my dear diary secion.
Anyway matters food had three quarters of a banana at 3.30, then egg and beans about 6. Barfed that up, ate in a rush I think. Went to mother in laws and saw Ruth and Pauls excellent pics from New York. Bit of webbing later on and been invited to a weight loss surgery support group in Leeds on Friday, bit apprehensive, but would like to go, there are practical things, like getting to Leeds for 6.30 on a Fridaybut we'll see. Just had a phone call from Si, whose 40th we went to last week one of our contemporaries Peter, died on Saturday, just out of the blue. We all used to be in the Boys Brigade together many moons ago. Funeral on Tuesday at 1pm, I'll have to make a few phonecalls, that's knocked me for six.

Tuesday - early starter

Haircut yesterday and that always helps, Frank is so positive. Back to the house and a call from Tina who is pre-op two weeks out, she is coming to see us on Sunday. Hope it helps her. Off to the gym then quick tea, which comes back whilst watching program about wls. Corrie climax for trickie dickie. Up at 6 this morning to pick Ruth and Paul up from the airport, they enjoyed New York but looked tired. Digestion out of kilter as a consequence. Getting there now, and off to work shortly. Going to Hammy House so not sure what to do about lunch.

Monday Monday

Went to the hospital yesterday, Nanny Banks looks better, though going to be in for another week, while they organise a home assessment. The outcome of which will be that the house aint suitable, but she aint movin so why bother. The interaction between my mum and my nan does my head in. It was bedtime last night before I was able to tell Jean and Ally about it. The deafness, shouting, repetition, multitheaded conversations, racism, and time delay conspire to wreck my head. At least with my sister there, I feel strength in numbers. Got home eat lasagne nice, went for a walk round the block, without stopping and not even breathless. I messed about with website and stuff, girls went to church, and pathfinders. I stayed up late bit of trouble getting off to sleep. Couldn't use my PC to acess my work account - not good.Got up early (8.30 middle of the night for me). Webbed away the first part of the day till waking a sleeping Ally at 10.30. I need a haircut today so its off to Franks at some point. Left some tidying work and catering to sort. Had a hankering last night for roast potatoes. Contacted by a woman from Bury last night, Tina, she is 10 days pre-op invited her over. It certainly helped me talking to someone before the op. Waiting for an email or call back today. Back to work tomorrow. Eileens dad passed away last week, never easy, no matter what age and whatever circumstances. I will try to make the funeral on Friday.
Have to go the gym later today I think, or tomorrow after work.

Sunday Morning

Well things got busy as they do. I went to the gym. I LOST 9.5LBS THIS WEEK, I was made up big time, I had eaten the most since the op and lost that much weight, and feel great. Fair ran round the gym, done more walking then ever cardiovascular up to 35 minutes. Made up.Had a good natter with Van, he's sports development manager or something, doesn't usually supervise the gym more strategic I think. Anyway his degree is in PE and IT so we had a lot to talk about. He's got a mate who is a Javascript programmer who is going to do me a Body Mass Index calculator (Its a way of calculating how obese you are) developed in 1840. We had a good rant about many subjects under the sun. Got home and was a bit excited about my weight loss, had some covent garden chicken soup, with bread. Something got stuck and I went in to reverse mode and a little barf. Cant help thinking I should have chewed more, also the excitement meant I should have waited. Part of the learning curve said Jean, right as always.
Worked on website and nattered to Mick on MSN messenger. Went to pick mum up from the royal, she dont look well but says she is better. She wanted to go to LIDL a german discount supermarket on London Road. She likes it because its cheap and does good boiled ham. Its a weird place, man with one copy of big issue sat outside, not many white faces inside, and a plethora of weird products. I bought a keyboard and mouse from there before christmas for Ally. The wine range looked and I was taken by their 2.99 cabernet, very nice indeed. Dropped mum off and went to Tesco, nice white middleclass experience, a lot more comfortable,did a little shop. And realised how far apart the Tesco and Lidl worlds are. Hmm. Nothing on telly after the cricket last night till Parky at 10.20, I am getting old, Parky and Radio 2, I'll be buying hush puppies next, and sports casuals. England winning at both rugby and cricket in the same year? weird. Got up late and messed about on PC, paper interesting this morning. Read all about fergie and becks which I hadn't followed during this week. Big night on Corrie tomorrow Tricky Dickie confesses all, at 7.30 there is a documentary on BBC1 about weight loss surgery. Have to record that somehow.Off to see Nanny Banks in Hospital report back later.

Saturday morning part one

York summary.
Most participative holiday I have had for ever. Got right involved and walked for ages (with crutch). Feeling stiff and sore now though. Cottage was great though the cold tap in the kitchen got stuck in the on position, and I had to turn the water on and off at the mains. York is a beautiful city and the area around is great, recommend it to anyone who hasn't been. Though I did suffer tweaks of nausea I didn't barf in anger. I had solid food and tried somethings...toasted teacake with butter, blueberry muffin, covent garden chicken soup,fruit strawberry,kiwi and melon. Spag bol, tagliatelle with ham and mushroom. Sorry it seems the gastroscopy eas a major success. I guess I am feeling now how most people feel 4 weeks post op. By then the majority stop barfing, trust me be to be in the 99th percentile of a normal distribution. Did I mention my statistics O level grade C. Thats the first time I have ever used it.
The holiday did make me realise how impaired my mobility had been, and how much it has improved. Also how much Jean and Ally have had to put up with and miss out on. No more of that I'm in and up for it all now. We got back at lunchtime as Ally had an appointment at the orthodontist, who proposes quite a bit of work. Whilst it will be traumatic, I am sure it will be worth it in the long run. Got back to hundreds of emails, most of it junk, but some good stuff and the wlsinfo is generating traffic.
Visited by Colin, Hannah and Jenny and spouted about how great the holiday was. Then off to town to see D off. He is in the TA and has been called up for the gulf. He seems fairly relaxed about it all, but it made me and several other people shiver. Watching all the crap on the telly about it is one thing but when its people that you know, going off to fight it gets very scary and real. I am well against the war, Bush is a lunatic and Blair is backed into a corner with him, and people like my mate will be lost as a consequence - a mixed bag of feeling. It was a good turnout, alot of old friends there, some very pleased to see me, a few people who didnt recognise me. One girl who was at school with Jean was really interested and made up I had had the op. I sat with Paul, who recently left my employ for a better job. He is a guardian reading left winger like my self (honest) I was relieved he felt the same stuff as me . Mad war, out to support our mate, and we'll have a party when he comes back, and I'll feel as uncomfortable as I did when the Falklands boys returned way back when. My daughter tells me Blue are bringing out an anti war song, haven't we got enough good ones already? MAybe we should send Blue in, that would force saddam into submission, and a lot more environmentally friendly than war.
I am still on the labour party email list despite ripping up my card over student fees at university, they sound out a missive any time tony needs help. He has spoken to some exiled Iraqis and they told him its right. I aint convinced. The other debate last night was who to vote for at the next election - bit of a worry that.
Got home and did a bit of surfing, and website maintenance with the aid of my wlsinfo mate Mick a cockney geezer from swansea. Jane another wls info mate has done a couple of book reviews so that will need posting today, well in Jane. So today, gym for me, haircut and dancing for Ally, girls going swimmin, pick my mum up from hospital and england vPakistan on the telly. Squeeze in some web stuff as well, my computer feels neglected.

Friday night

Been too busy to blog today and too tired now. Will attempt to fully catch up tomorrow.

Post lunch nausea

four little bits of bread with the soup and i feel sick and full. Back to blogging to divert my attention and refocus the brain. Mum is feeling better was the report recieved this morning. Ruth and Paul have gone to New York, Happy birthday ruth and I hope they can find me a cheap pocket PC. if not I'll be buying one next week. dell have brought out a little one that looks the part only 270squid as well, that'll do me. York is a lovely city and lots of street entertainers etc, very touristy but hey I like that. Had a look at wlsinfo the website I have set up and 12 members now registered and good amount of traffic flowing. Read a book on Internet cafes before my dinner, seems they have them everywhere now. Anyway going to get off now and look at the York archy trust thing and chat to my mate mick on msnmessenger

Thursday in york

Back in the cybercafe, 4 hours access for a tenner and usuable in 10 minute blocks, free cup of coffee. So i am made up. What a great time we are having I am walking like a star, and striding out everywhere. Girls are off shopping again after ally relctantly agreed to a day in the country yesterday. we had a bit of a drive and ended up in helmsley, then went to a deserted abbey I'll have to look up the spelling http://www.theheritagetrail.co.uk/abbeys/rievaulx_abbey.htm cant seem to make this into a hyperlink but it was great. Rievaulx abbey set in this valley at the edge of the north york moors. It was quite a moving place, very history. Once them two shoppers have had their retail therapy I am going to try to persuade em to go yorkshire archaeological trust. They will love that going to have some soup now back later

Gonna break for lunch now

Time for a break i wonder how much this has cost.

Cybercaff in York

What a place, Apple Macs. filter coffee, soup, and funky music. My first cybercafe experience phenomenal!! The girls have gone off shopping, and they are going somewhere nice for lunch without me, so they can eat better. I'll have soup in here.
The holiday has started fine, we left yesterday at 11ish and landed at M&S warrington, to stock up on emergency provisions. Eat lunch in the revive cafe, very nice I had my first carrot and coriander soup and bread. I was made up. Chugged along the motorway, stopped at services and had a large americano with sugar in. Got to flaxton, a pretty village and had to pick the keys up. Cottage (bungalow) on its own in the middle of nowhere, no houses for about half a mile. Saw a wild rabbit in the garden, so like saddos we stood mouths agape. In the visitors book someone wrote they saw a badger in the garden. Then this morning there were two pheasant/grouse type creatures in the main field. Its like a BBC2 documentary.
We went to tesco yesterday evening for petrol and coal and logs. made up with my increased mobility. Then back home for real fire and watching telly. Monday is not bad especially for soaps.
Great to stay in a place and not get worried about being stuck in bath or breaking chairs. Feel fantastic, OK I know I am a little manic but that beats depressed any day of the week. Rang home mum feeling better she's been to the docs and got antibiotics, and Nanny Banks is getting released today.
I am gonna write some postcards and just chill. Then a bit of shopping and off to pics tonight to see the Two Towers. Have to call at some shops and get a paper as well.

Monday morning

exciement mounts holiday draws near. Lobster and prawn all stayed in the appropriate place, and feeling tops. Printed out some photos of Olive the housekeeper in the MAtchworks, sent em in by post so Gail when Olive recieves them please explain. I also realised I have lost the gift of handwriting, so she wont be able to read the scrawled note. The weight loss world is getting interesting. My new chum Mick has been banned from a discussion board, I may well walk out in a display of solidarity.
All go here, rarin for the off. Will attempt to find a cyber cafe in York and update later in the week

Sunday evening

Last nights parties - a game of two halves, first over to Irby on the Wirral For Simons 40th. Me driving the big red bus, Paul navigating and Ruth and Jean chillin in the back. Found it ok, funny place locked door, buzz for access only two guys on security. Women only allowed in the Lounge. Very cheap drinks though and the reception area is plastered with minor celebs publicity shots, very phoenix nights. No talking when artistes are on sign.Met David and Jill there him looking strangely young (40 next year I believe). Nuts in bowls on tables, I felt like a peanut, or rather a big bag of peanuts. The drinks was a funny thing I aint seen for years. The spirits came in miniature bottles which hold 2.5 measures. Even those who remember me in full on drinking mode will vouch that these are a surefire way to end up bevvied very quickly. Responsible for many lost nights in the Winwick Hospital social club where I spent my formative years. Angie, Si's wife showed her extensive blog knowledge by asking how my Nanny Banks is. SI's mum and dad where there too, Simon and his dad are living proof of genetics, more like clones than anything (Apologies if I just upset anyone, I meant it in a nice way). Buffet looked good, and met Gibbo and his wife, Gibbo used to be in the boys brigade with me and Si. I haven't seen him since I got married, you've put on wieght he said.
Left there and bombed back to Sefon Park Conservative club, (Conservative in name only, any political affiliation died out years ago). Entered through the main door to see the singer crooning away, oh no Phoenix nights again. This was Marvin Maggots party aka John the youngest son of Hazel and Dave, fine old friends. Quite a few people who haven't seen me since the op so a few double takes and I was even ignored by two people who obviously didnt recognise me. Sat with Ruth ruth paul jean tommy phil and alan. They all got off fairly early but Jean and I stayed a while. Had a dance and a few glasses of redwine, and three bottles of water. nice buffet there too. I had some milk.
Got up late and went to see Nanny Banks in the Royal. She is sharing a room with three confused ladies and two other in full possession of faculties. The confused people were wandering round interfering looking physically sstrong. The people with their faculties were all frail.and mostly chairbound. Nanny was distressed, the confusion gets worse at night and she wants out. I went to have a chat to the ward sister about her. She is waiting for a doppler test, but they can do it as an outpatient, what about home they said, well the house is a death trap, she should be in residential care but wont go. She has reluctantly agreed to stay till tomoorow and see a doc, and increasse her care package to include an evening visit. Mum looked iller than Nanny and we should have too kNanny home and left mum in her place.
Picked my car up on way home and called at new bookstore in Speke, cant remember the name? Big place very impressed, and a starbucks in there too, got some american computer magazines, kewl. Lobster and prawn crepes for tea yum yum.

Saturday Afternoon

Bright and cheerful today, the weather and me too. Just got back from the gym lost nearly seven pound since Monday. Thats 11stone 2 lost, I feel good. Contacted by tina from Leeds who runs a support group in one of the hospitals there, she's a nurse and hoping to do some collaborative work. Sounds good. Cardiovascular exercise up to thirty three minutes.
LAst night visited by Jenny and her dad Phil gave Jenny a lift back to the station after the funeral, Jean went the crem, but I was avoiding it so stayed at work. On the way to work I saw my good friend Cozzie he's the cook at the bridge chapel. Topman to boot.
Spoke to Mickey Browne today, booking tickets for yes and Jools Holland at the summer pops. Should be good.

Friday morning

Only a little barf last night no serious side effects and eating ok this morning. I am going into work just so I can say I have been there every day this week. Which feels a bit normal, have to go the gym after that so a few hours onl. Discovered on the way home last night I can eat bananas. Might stop this 3 oclock dip I have beeen experiencing.

Thursday night

Had a call from Mick WLS friend who has lost eight stone. Set off for work meeting with auditor decent guy with ok sense of humour. Lunched then off to Hammy Productive time with Caroline and Fran.
Got home had mince and pasta, barfed a bit - we don't like that. Watched ER on E4 chatted to other WLSers on bgab

Thursday am

Work went wellish, got a bit tired towards the end, there seems such a lot to do and my energy reserves seem so low. Had a talk with Heather from days in mental health a long time ago. I immersed myself fully in the mental health experience, so much so I got severe depression, which still lingers in the background. I think I am a better person/manager for the experience. It has certainly helped to recognise and acknowledge when other bods are suffering. Anyone reading this who thinks it contains coded messages for them, should know me better. I don't do coded messages I only straight up front stuff. And YOU are probabaly paranoid, I certainly am. Didn't make the gym decided I could n't do everything so went home and went to bed. (After a dose of health giving buildup). Felt better on waking then bugged round getting ready for the quiz. We came second - we beat our main rivals (the team I usually play for), and that is what counts. After dropping everyone off I went to Tesco at ten past 12, how sad is that. I had to buy some cereal, the breakfast situation had got dire here. Hence the strawberry yoghurt fiasco yesterday. Cornflakes on board I am heading for a meeting with an auditor at the matchworks, this morning then off to see Fran at Hamilton House later. Need to fit a gym visit and nutrition in along the way. Got my book from obesityhelp.com this morning, called making the journey togetherits a collection of patient experiences only cost 10 dollars P&P inc. Right onward and upward.

Wednesday still on the up

Got to the conference for 10ish felt a bit ropey but soon perked up. Good atmosphere at the conference, good speakers, it taught me quite a lot about making health information accessible for people with impairments. Talk about accessible conferences they had a mike wired up to a loop system, two signers, two lip speakers and a guy transposing everything saud and projecting it on to a really easy to read screen. Some points about written info which should be obvious but aren't. They had a guy from Surrey who talked about accessibility - and how jargon is crap. He used real examples to illustrate. Laurence and Steve gave good value for money, met Lily Hopkins again she used to give me a hard time when she was chair of the Community Health Council. She is now chair of North Liverpool Primary Care Trust - doesnt fit into the usual stereotype of white, middle class, retired, or political appointee that abounds in the non-exec role(though it is getting better). Had a good day(till three) saw Gail and Sandra from South, Anita from Mosaic and quite a few people who clearly knew me but I wasn't sure who they were. Visited in the evening by Dave and Hazel, had a raucous good laugh. Their youngest (who I think is about 8) is 21 on Saturday. So we'll be busy, Simon (of bypass and Angie fame) is having a party same night. So over to Irby (over the water) and then back to the Con club for a stay behind. Friday is Mabels funeral, a lady who was 90+ from our old church. Don't know if I'll be going. Today then, got up late need to breakfast though the choices seem limited - I am a bit sick of tinned pears. Off to a meeting with Martin at 11.30 a GP in Garston. Need to go into work and get a gym visit in as well. Tonight our quiz team is making its first visit to Winwick. Jean, Ruth, Colin Paul and me who had regular outings pre-op at the cricket club are looking for a new gig. We are called the F&T's a well balanced team (or we used to be until I lost my memory). The girls are good at popular culture, films, Paul is a scientist, Colin is a sports and history bod. I just remember some daft things - or used to we'll see. My knowledge of seventies music and TV is sad in the extreme. Looking forward to it.

Tuesday am

Up early feeling good, ingesting a tinned pear now for breakfast, feeling full better stop. Due at a conference today at Anfield organised by Laurence Clark a good geezer who is a mate of mine. Said I wouldn't make all day but would make a guest slot at some time. Thats how it is, I hate being unreliable but - its all on the day. I felt great 5 mins ago but that pear is starting to fight back. Also worried about the sloppy diet provision at Anfield might have to nip out anf find a soup kitchen. Generally the rule is no work before 10.30 -11 but hell that could change, I am still on the up. Posted something for a friend on GP-UK and had a really nice message of personal support from the list owner. Generally on the up still.

Monday evening

Who would have thought things could get better. Discovered one of our neighboursis doing drop off pick up ironing service. 20 items for a tenner. Yahoo good on ya lets have some of that -he is coming at 6.15 to pick up the first load. More feedback later. Wandered into work and felt strangely good. Busy on the email front lot of stuff to clear. Then its off to the gym and and then pick Ally and the girls up. Heinz ravioli in a tin tonight. Yahoo - solidish food. Part two of Second coming tonight at nine.Things are looking up

Monday Morning

Up fairly effortlessly before 8 - still feeling good. Whats going on, like the eternal pessimist I keep waiting for thegood weather to break instead of enjoying the warm spell. Yesterday was good. Mooched about and went tosee Nanny Banks in hospital. She is on ward 2X at the Royal a ward I used to work on. None of the family seem to have a clue what's going on with her, I offered to speak to the staff but this was declined - I aint sure why. The hoped for comedy seam did not materialise, mainly as thepresence of mother grandmother and other people leads to multiple conversations all occurring simultaneously. Headache on return. Upgraded TV package to Skysports for the duration of the cricket world cup. Watched the end of the W.Indies v South Africa game - great to see the W.Indies win. Upgrading TV resulted in loss of broadband service so I was on the phone for an hour around midnight. Watched a program called the second coming starring Christopher Ecclestone, weird but strangely watchable.

Sunday morning

Two good days in a row - whats going on. I was first up this morning and took the girls driks in bed? Yesterday visited by Archie and Ali Lee. what a good time that child is great, he is only 13 months but we get on well, same level as me Jean says. Went to the local Somerfield and stocked up on emergency goods pending Tesco home delivery this pm. Made some chicken stock which I will turn into soup for today, and freeze some to take to work. Started to watch west wing last night but hadn't seen it before, so switched it off then watched CSI:Miami which was ok till the fellers face blew off and Ally said turn it off. So we resorted to a Tivo'd version of NYPD blue and then the DVD of the Old Grey Whistle test I got for my birthday. Did a lot of work on The new weight loss support site.

Saturday am

After the rant and scope I felt better. Yesterday was one good day, plenty to eat still sloppy but feeling good. Top workout at gym. But high in mood if anything relief at getting out of hospital with a clean bill of health was enormous. Ally still coughing and Jean sounds terrible, yesterday I was not the sickest person in the house. Getting a buzz from www.wlsinfo.org.uk site, getting very positive vibes. Also found another support site www.bgab.co.uk Big girls are best - if they are why are they talking about weight loss surgery?? I wrote an email to the Webmistress, apologising coz I thought we had setup the first UK site. She was really sound about it and there is room for plenty more support. On the family note Nanny Banks still in the Royal, but this makes mum feel better as she knows she is looking after her. I am going to visit her tomorrow so hoping to strike a rich comedy seam.

Friday Morning

Oh yesterday - another bad day. Started before 7am - not good but at least being nil bymouth I had no worries about getting breakfast in. Doctor said I needed to be there between 7.30 and 8am . So Jean called a taxi at 7.30 and we veritably flew to Aintree, 10 quid for the ride but no worries. Arrived cheerfully at the ward and allocated a bed in room 4. Pleased to see both Wigan and Gallman already in situ, Wiganman got into the bed at 6pm last night. Asked some questions by really nice nurse all the usual about makeup, crowns and false limbs. Tried to refrain from making quips that she had heard a thousand times, but couldn't resist and got her with two she said she hadnt heard before and she appeared to be amused. Interupted by Specialist Registrar, with two students in tow. This is Mr Clare - He had a Vertical banded gastroplasty in september and has now started to put on weight, ER NO I INTERRUPTED, I HAD A ROUX EN Y AND HAVE BEEN BARFFING SINCE, AND I HAVE LOST 10 ST 9LBS AND GAINED LESS THAN A KILO IN THE LAST WEEK. As soon as the words uttered from these innocent lips I knew I had made a grave error.Contradicting him in front of med students was a major war crime. He promised to draw them a diagram later (probably of the M25 I thought but somehow managed to restrain from saying it), I was second on the list so be expecting about 10am. Cool I thought, I had deliberately travelled light one carrier bag containing only a guardian couple of mags and a book about weight loss. Still the mental clock told me I could be home about 2pm worst case scenario - not bad. Met George in next bad what you in for I asked, "removal of pollack from up my arse," side effect from cancer a few years ago. Unlikely that a pelagic fish was resting there I suggested "polyp," thats the word he said. Turns out 88 year old George was going to be the saviour of my stay, his acute Liverpool wit was in top form, and his stories from the war were crackers. I spoke to him for over an hour, he was at Dunkirk in WW2 and ended up in bomb disposal. A great bloke, riddled with cancer but cracking funnies and flirting with the nurses like a good un. On the other side was a man who seemed to have a pair of pigs trotters grafted on to his feet, didnt look good and well sore I thought. Turns out he was to be "double bunion man." 9.30 approached time to strip off and don my ill fitting theatre gown. Despite the rapid weight loss there was still a six inch shortfall at the back. Having read about this on some weight loss site I asked for another gown and wore that back to front. Dignity preserved I went ( wearing two gowns and approved pure cotton boxers) for my last pee. Came back to my chair and duly went into hyperpanic mode.
Now let me explain, I was frightened of the bypass op, but this was nowt I have had two gastroscopies in the past and seen several inflicted on people over the years. Hailed as a miracle of diagnostics, I was still not keen. Swalling that ominous black looking thing while being told to relax was not for me, and have I mentioned the gag reflex, put your fingers down your throat and gag, mine is really good, especially trained up after all this vomitting. Warning bells were starting to clang, fight or flight, they call it. I sat there suffering for hours silently, looked at the clock and its twenty five to ten.Still the breakfast that a couple of lads had looked awful and I wasnt bothered I read the Guardian cover to cover all three sections. Looked at clock twenty to ten, Decided to have some sport, wigan and gall were both daily mail men (see yesterday) but I had todays newspaper. Would you like to see it, they took it in good stead, there was an article about Jamie bulgers killers suggesting they should never have gone down for it. I waited and waited and waited.........................................................................................................
Dinner time came too that looked ok, sandwiches soup and pud. 2pm I asked nice nurse what was going on, yup I was second on thelist but the Doc shouldnt have given you a time. Maybe the first case turned out complex, fair doos.
3 o'clock asked other nurse, I'll ring theatre she said complex case on the table running late fair doos.
Teatime spoke to Jean, I had gone to sit at the nurses station as the food was making me sick. I said after consultation come in at 8 and bring a bag for the night stay or take me home.
6 came and went - Exgall man returned from theatre, porter lady said I'll change the trolley bedding then I am taking you down . result, I had to be restrained for jumping on staright away.
Downhill push till theatre, thought this will be bad coming back. Got to waiting area - 8 hour wait had helped settle my anxiety. Clearly some cock up as they said you shouldnt be here yet - I looked for something to chain the trolley to - I aint going nowhere.
Mr K the surgeon turns up and apologises, explains the scope cleaner had broke this morning got it fixed this affy. So they rearranged the list and and put big case on first. Mr K had told someone to ring the wards of me and the other guy who seemed to be having a similar thing done, to say it would be after 6 and we could drink till 12. Message never got through, was I fed up. While I was able to sit at the nurses station, the staff had looked at the hospital intranet, to see in real time the menu in the staff canteen, they can see where prescriptions are up to in pharmacy why arent the theatre lists on line?????????? With patents name procedure and status - pending - in progress, on ward totally bewildered etc. You cannot blame the Docs and nurses clearly someone needs to manage this it was a mess.
The two nurses who waited with me in theatre were the best great at conversing and relaxing me turns out they were D grades (lowest qualified in theatre), promote them immediatly they could see all the problems. They had the solutions but nobody seemed to ask them. The clinical care was faultless, as ever. I told Mr K I was terrified and wanted a big slug of some drug. We had a chat about the website and to be honest I was so strung out I cant remember much. Other man went first i spoke to nurse which reassured me (or at least diverted me).
Wheeled in, bg slug of drug and spray into back of throat, spray tastes of rotten bananas, says Mr K and something else, oh and petrol says he's right, another flambe dessert idea.
Wake up in recovery, had a stretch I think no ulcers, good see him soon. Can stay or go home. Up to me (and Jean I thought) Saw Dr Shearer the anaesthetist from bypass I think but could have been a near death experience - that was good stuff. Run back up hill to ward, cant have been easy. Straight to chair and got dressed, still drunk. Need a pee and a drink before you can go said nurses. Fair doos. Drink, water milk, pee, Jean arrives walk round the ward. DO you think I am fit love? Yes Can I go nurse? I am gone fall asleep in the car, pick Ally up from somwhere watch ER??? fall asleep go to bed wake up with sore throat.
Overall feeling relief - I survived the system Ken 2 Aintree 0.

Thursday

Bad day - not sure what to write

Wednesday later

Day started off bad - blizzard conditions and early rise. Got to Aintree 10 mins late. Reported to admissions room, and handed in my slip of paper. Which consisted of several questions, the answers to which were all contained in the letter they sent with said admission slip. What was this then - a literacy test. The lady took it off me and checked the details all without a word. She then gave me garbled directions to ward 61, to be fair the admissions office was in crisis, the printer had just gone down (been unplugged) and the kettle was broke. Pleased with the return of the printer to working status she now gave me a new admission slip (3 copies of same info). There was a desk labelled PALS in the reception, where I would have commented but I was Billy-no-mates. Trekked to ward 61, with heavy bag. Rabbit warren of a place full of very ill looking people (last legs type stuff). The nurses were in some sort of meeting, all sat round drinking tea, they told me to go and wait in the dayroom.The description and directions were poor, it was actually a cupboard, with an artificial plant and several chairs. There was a nice couple who had arrived half an hour early (he waiting for gall bladder out). We were then joined by a couple from Wigan, who had clearly suffered at the hands of Wigan Hospitals inc. He had been told that he had inoperable cancer of the common bile duct (pancreas type area). A chance comment had led to him being referred to Aintree where it was now operable. We had since been joined by a fourth patient. He had worse cancer than the first guy and he used to be a docker. There then followed a rapid exchange of which of their offal was being removed, each upping the other one in every one. Mr Docker won when he reported his wife had died from cancer last year. Neither of them were impressed with plain old ordinary gall bladder chap so I was rather nervous when they asked what I was in for. I was tempted just to show my scar and claim full offal removal, but I came clean and no one was impressed. We had a great discussion for about two hours covering all subjects. Punctuated by 2 trays of tea. About 11.30 Sister came to inform us there were no beds, but she was working on it. To be fair we had a good old natter and the time flew. Subjects included War, asylum seekers, pubs, Michael Jackson. Docker didn't take a daily paper, wigan and gallman were daily mail readers, kept my pinko guardian in my bag.
Another sister appeared and claimed gall man and me. We were off to ward one. I became alarmed at the signs reading department of reproductive medicine, gynae assessment and "what are polycystic ovaries." Clearly that was the first stage when entered ENT land, people with strange nose bandages, at the end of the corridor was our destination - odds and sods quick turnaround. Take a seat in the dayroom, cupboard with window and telly, gall man was whisked off. We were soon joined by Wigan man and lunch. There were about seven other people clearly waiting for beds. Lunch was some ice cream after a lengthy discussion about diets with the hostess. Whisked off by sister to clerk me in. Need to see a doc she said, it looks busy I said I don't mind doing what needs doing then sleeping at home. She said all of you are doing that anyway. Back to day room were everyone was reading the daily mail, its getting worse. Doctor appears explains what I was having done quite well and got me to sign the form. Can I go now sister? No you need to have blood taken . Fair enuff, join queue of seven. Can I go now sister, no you need to see junior doc. And that will be when - an hour or so...ok so off to Sefton suite where I had the op to see the staff. And a guy waiting for the op that day - he was nervous, I had a good natter with him I hope it was useful. Staff dead impressed with weight loss. Ward one rang to say I was needed back to see doc. Arrived back saw doc an hour later. Can I go now sister - no you need ECG. Surely this could be done better, one of the women waiting was ready to freak out - if this was France there would be riots she said. Cant we get primary and secondary care sorted better to waste less of my time? Called in to see B bypass patient on Sefton suite 1 week post op and going home tomorrow, had a good natter and hope it helped her - certainly helped me. Picked up by Jean and Ally. Back home feeling goosed and a bit like things were so bad in the NHS..

Wednesday teatime

GRRRRR back at home, wasted day at Aintree no beds, go back tomorrow at 7.30. Bit frustrated and narked at the moment. Will tell more later.

Wednesday

Hit the matchworks yesterday, all went well came home and went to bed.Cars nearly sorted. Had some wine to counteract extreme nerves at thought of entering hospital system. Woke extremely early and ready to go by 8.15. Got weighed at the gym and I have put on a kilo, no probs as I have been stuffing things in like a pig. The world has a light dusting of white this am and all set for admission. Ally is geared up to blog tonight for me. See you soon

Tuesday 10am

Got to sleep after 4, woke at 9.45, now medicating. ingesting calories and abluting and putting on a brave face before hitting the Matchworks.

Tuesday in the wee small hours

Slept fitfully till lunchtime disturbed by Ally and Jean, both sent home of of URTI. Idled on the computer tried to work but felt rough. Watch out for the diarrhoea the dietitian said, you know this milky diet. Well it arrived today, kick a man when he is down or what. Flapping about going in to hospital big time. Had to drive to Royal Hospital to pick mum up, Nanny Banks has been admitted, well left on a trolley with suspected DVT and cellulitis. I had to drive Jeans car. People who know me in person will know I drive a bariatric car. A ford Galaxy people carrier. Jean drives a fiesta their dinkiest of cars, except for the KA. I felt like a jumbo jet pilot in a single seat propellor aircraft, and so close to the ground. All the rest of the traffic was big and scary especially the people carriers. Nanny is settled(on her trolley for a change), mum is settled, someone else is looking after Nanny.The girls sound rough, I am hovering near the toilet wondering which end of me will rebel first. Feeling weak.... Oh and going to work tomorrow at 10am alledgedly. Start the meeting without me I'll be in when I come round. I have to go though and doing some interviews with Sam, Didn't want to miss the team meeting though. Feel guilty after being so well for the party, and worried about what will go on in hospital. Funny how problems seem bigger in the wee small hours.

Monday am

Got up at an unearthly hour to drop car off at bodyshop. Feel nearly dead - going back to bed. May post more later, if I survive.

Sunday

Tired went out for lunch (soup and ice cream) did a bit of work on wlsinfo website. Not up for much.

Saturday Night

Legs and back still stiff from dancing. Got some great presents, and went off to Speke retail park to spend vouchers. Got DVD's of The Old Grey Whistle test and a documentary about Hadfield - home tothe league of gentlemen. Some books and a cracking guide to Frontpage 2002. Just playing with it now, tired early night for us all I think

Saturday Morning - Happy new year

A very good night last night - started off jittery if people would turn up but got better. I was more relaxed than ever. The red wine helped, I was even caught dancing (an activity which in previous years I really enjoyed). Can't hardly walk this morning though. Few no shows (but there always is), some late arrivals from Sefton/Hammy house who had been out on the pop in town. Bar still serving at 2 only diehards left then though. Good representation from the matchworks, Maghull, Hammy House, and even some faces from Mental Health days. Good representation from Jeans side of the family and Grandma looked like she had a good time. Bob Clare my cousin who looks more like my dad than I do and his wiife June made an appearance. The poor family support was probably down to my tardiness in organising/inviting people. Still never mind, all present seemed to have a good time, the disco was considerably better than last year and there were plenty up to dance. I took some photos and I'll post them somewhere later. Bit tired and stiff this morning.

Friday the day after Allys birthday and the night of the party

Woke up just after 12 feeling terrible. No energy at all. I have to make an effort to get up and go in to work. Awoke to the news of my call up papers for the hospital next week. Rang to confirm I will be turning up 9 am on Wednesday. Seems I'll be going to theatre onThursday as there is no advice about starving. Ward 61, still in with both feet. Went to work had a peach sundae for lunch felt sick did a little and tried to sort out ordering my car. Off to High and Mighty, clothes for big and tall men in Liverpool. I stpped going there a few years ago when I got too big. They max out at a 4X - I was into 7X from sizedwell on the net. Today I was measured and I am a 3X. Not much choice as its the penultimate day of the sale. Still picked up two shirts and got a further 9 quid off them. Back home stopping at taste good a local chippy/chinese take away for some soup. The lady who runs the shop is really nice and was impressed with my weight loss. Prior to surgery I used to call there for Dim Sum after a work out at the gym. Saw Paul J a Doc I did somework with over the last couple of years. He was shocked by the change. Got an email from a guy asking about bariatric surgery, got a quick reply of and pointed him to some sources. Party nerves start to kick in, always wonder at this time how many people will turn up. I hope everything goes well. Ally is off to a school Disco and has opted to stay at Lizzies house ovenight. The original plan was back to theparty and then to Nannas.

Thursday Ally's Birthday

Up at 6.45 to celebrate birthday open prezzies etc. Back to bed by 7.45 eventually crawled out of the pit at 2pm. I am well bushed - definitely more awake of an early evening. Limited my exercise to gentle exercise and web surfing. Family coming round tonight or birthday cake and prezzies etc. Work still progressing on wlsinfo. Going into work tomorrow for a couple of hours at least.

Wednesday

Car got vandalised outside Garston Hospital last night, mirror broken - gits. I shall complain to the management. Mum got her feet done and was walking better as a result. I did a lot of tinkering with the website last night. Also ordered some books from USA round weight loss surgery. Slept in late - got up did some work breakfasted and went back to bed no energy. Felt dog rough eat several things -more than usual. Got a note from Hilda who sent my book back - got the idea of setting up a little library for prospective patients going to talk to the library and the PALS (whatever that is).
Tired and weary but eating like a horse Ally's birthday tomorrow - means an early start

Tuesday evening

Morning started bad, couldn't get up had to pick Jane up at the top of the road at 10.20. The weather had gone barmy, hailstones and mad wind. Needed to get some petrol as the warning light had been flashing at me. Got to North PCT for the Virtual Training Team meeting. Dave, Jane, Rose, Kate and Terry, a fine bunch a group with loads of potential. Did a bit of a churchillian speech about whats going on in the bigger picture - might have sounded a bit mad -I am sure I was hypoglycaemic. Still some things needed saying. There will be a lot of developments in health informatics in the coming months. Left late got to the dietitian late - dont like being late. I was impressed with Jenny. We have decided to continue to try to Max the calorie intake until my scope next week. Messages were clear back to six small high cal snacks a day. Even on a good day I haven't been eating enough. She said a lot of things I am experiencing are classic signs of starvation. She was also surprised I was doing so much on so little intake. Agreed I need to cut that down and restrucutre the day. Avoid this early morning rush stuff. Booked to see her after the scope and come up with a plan for restarting real food. Felt good, went to Sainsburys across the road from the hospital bought some high cal snax. Got home felt goosed and off to bed. Didnt sleep but tried to rest. Picked mum up to take her for her chiropody appointment, 6.30 at night what is that about? Must ask the chirpody boss at work.

Tuesday

Been to a meeting and to the dietitian - too tired to write anything. Cancelled afternoon appt and going to sleep now. Eat more do less she said.

Ally's random contribuition- 2003

Oi Dad i'm not impressed by the lack of mentioning of my birthday!!! Thursday, incase any of you knowledge deprived people were wondering.

Monday

Tortured by computer problems last night, access to the net went down several times and progress was not made as I would have liked. Still there is something up there to see. Got up early and opened birthday presents. Got loads what a pile of stuff. Books DVD's, socks sweets, port toothbrush and radox. What a delight. As soon as the girls went to to work I was back off to sleep. I was exhausted, Jean phoned from work several times to wake me up. I was finding it impossible to rouse myself. Guts were not best today. Popped into the Matchworks picked some stuff up and then off to Childwall for interviews. Dog tired when I finished then home and straight to bed not enough energy today. Jean found me impossible to rouse when she got in. Usually we would be out for a meal and have a great time. Instead we got a chinese takeaway and I had a great bowl of crab and sweetcorn soup. A couple of drinks of red wine for me tonight and off to the dietitian tomorrow. Scope next wednesday or thursday and hopefully I will be sorted out.

Sunday

No website work done yesterday too busy messing around. Had a good workout got weighed and have lost less than a kilo so I guess thats good news. Out for picking up the party folk at 4.30, met with Jean and her gang at the cinema, tickets prebooked on the net were ready for collection. Coke and popcorn and few sweets cost 29 quid. Film was more fun than I thought it would be and my back was not in pain at all. I think I enjoyed it, had a small tub of Haagen Daaz vanilla and a bottle of water. Checked out Arbuckles American style diner which the kids really like. I had a knickerbocker glory - removed cream and marshmallows and just eat the ice cream. Very good value and all home by quarter past ten.
Late sleepin Sunday, very tired, visited by Ally, Paul and Archie. What a hoot that Archie boy is. Good few hours spent in a lot holiday talk. They are in Normandy the same time we are in Brittany so much in common. Passed on some of our Normandy tourist stuff as well. Email from Marta in States yesterday she sounds good. Several emails to respond to now, tax form to complete car to pick and website to launch, busy busy busy.

Saturday

Late rise, nutrition then gym. Off to the 5.30 showing of Chicago at the cinema then arbuckles for 7.45. Website work in between. Busy day, did I mention its my Birthday on Monday?

Fridays report

Jean says whats to discuss, and she's right I am up for the Gastroscopy. Friday morning started at 7.20, in the dark. Off to peoples to get the car serviced, MOT'd and a quote for some bodywork. John Mc picked me up outside there at 8.20. Breakfast and medication in Hammy House, a meeting about Training with Tony Paul and Adam. Taxi back to the matchworks and engage in more light duties and a chocolate mousse. Jean picked me up at 3.30 for the return trip to peoples. fifty quid for the wheel trims, MOT passed and 500 quid quote for the bodywork , I should have got it done on the insurance when it happened, doh.
Went to Childwall picked up Sam Paul and Jayne and off to the Atrium in town for Pauls leaving party. What a crap pub! Very young person. Gave some of them a lift to the Shere Khan indian restaurant for the next part of the night then shot off home. Usual Friday bash at Jeans Mums and home to chill. Realised we hadn't booked tickets for the cinema or restaurant for Allys party. OOPs, cinema OK, but restaurant full. Got a table in Arbukles, I had boycotted it when it was called Fatty Arbuckles but feel the name change was sufficient response to my protest. I was always worried about the waitress showing me to my table and saying...this way Mr Arbuckle. Hope they do soup but I doubt it. Got an email from Hilda who had the op last week she sounds great. Got to get my act together and polish up the weightloss website for Monday. It will be work in progres for a few weeks yet, constantly evolving etc. Had some red wine to cope with the rigours of the day, very pleasant.

Thursday Morning

Slept well and got up at 9.45. Tired but up for it. Seeing Veronica today for a bit of personal development planning, she is coming round here as there is nowhere privateto talk at childwall. Just got the Bryan Ferry tickets for Ruth and Jean they will be made up, he is on at the Phil in March. Not really my scene but never mind. Lorraine Mr K's secretary rang, he is on his way to the states for 4 days. Just wanted to let me know that he is happy with the website and will secure sponsorship. Also to let me know that I am listed for gullet stretching on 6th Feb. Gastroscopy and dilatation sounds preferable to me. Hmmm. The way I have been barfing aint good, this liquid diet aint good, and it can't go on. but I have had two gastroscopies in the past and they are the pits. Still if they give me a GA or enough valium that I can't feel or remember anything I am up for it. It involves an overnight stay apparently, not keen on that either. I will have to talk it through with Jean tonight but at face value it seems the right thing to do. Mild panic has set in - just when things were going well (though I really know that they weren't

Wednesday

Terrible sleep last night and woke up late. Made a meeting with Caroline an hour late, saw Dave about training and then met Paul Turner my equivalent from North PCT. Met a few people rond the building and all seemed shocked with weight loss and appearance. I had a discussion with someone who related the views of her friend, who feels that that weight loss surgery, is good for the individual but the money could be spent elsewhere for better benefit to the community. Wouldn't matter but this women is something in public health. I suppose there is more than one side to every story. Made me think though. Very low calorie intake today and felt a bit ropey. Got some work cleared and have a new enthusiasm for the job.

Tuesday night

Been to work early today. Did a presentation with Sam to the Primary Care Directorate. She is a star. My sense of humour wasn't quite in tune, I think it needs a bit of tweaking. Once we got into it it went well. Then it was off to Blackburne House for a conference. Met the Chief Information Officer for the strategic health authority Paul. He seems decent enough. It was all about how we will spend the load of dosh the govt will give us next year - unless they are buying munitions to trash a country thats already been trashed. I aint keen on this war stuff, caught a really good satire programme about it last night. It wont be funny when the killing starts. Going to try for a relatively early night tonight. Business cards for the new website arrived today, I'll have to send em to Mr K. Good to see the same faces at the Blackburne House today. Sorted out catering for the party tonight, all booked no cake needed.

Oasis

Just rang the Coca Cola customer careline. Bloggers will recall on Saturday I drank some Oasis summer fruits. No food value on side, Summer fruits comes in at a scandalous 41cals per 100mls thats 200cals a bottle - no more for me I am afraid. The citrus punch is 43 per 100. Aint weight loss sad, once again its nice so musnt be allowed instinct worked.

Monday AM

No work today - cept clearing emails from home. Had a lousy nights sleep, troubled with what my GP describes as prozac dreams. Graphic three D surround sound affairs with bizarre storylines. Jean left me sleeping and rang after nine to get me up - no way. Then Cheryl from work rang at 10 to say she and Steve have bought the house three doors up from here. Firing on only 2 out of 6 cylinders this morning. Not helped by the fact the glass exploded when I was mixing my buildup drink. Got to gym, and haircut this pm. Also a presentation to write for tomorrow morning. and a web site to sort busy busy busy. Back feeling better though.

Sunday Morning

Woke relatively early at 10.30. Felt good when I woke up, drinking build-up soon put that right. Feel guilty as Jean has to do all the cooking for the lunch, her mum, Alan ruth and Paul are coming. Roast beef, gratin dauphinoise, ratatouille and eton mess. Soup and ice cream for me I think. The strong smells of onion andgarlic really knock mey stomach off. I'm trying to be of use by keeping out of the way and going to pick Ruth and Paul up from Church. Back feels pretty good - Frank as usual is spot on with his plan. Got weighed yesterday lost 5lbs in a week, lost the bit of paper with the details on so need to find it and update chart. Need to get to grips with WLSInfo.org.uk over the next few days, launch planned for 27th Jan (my birthday).Can't go out for a meal so we might as well launch a website instead. Couldn't find anything on the web about the calorific value of Oasis - not a good sign - but a nice drink.

Saturday night

I was Thirsty when taking my mum home so I stopped in the newsagents by her and bought a bottle of oasis summer fruits. It was great, but did not contain details of food value etc so must be disalllowed. I will check later.

Saturday

Dog tired yesterday after work, avoided the temptation to go to sleep. Went to mother in laws, after first picking up Ruth and Paul whose car has died. Went to Tesco with them after and got myself down looking at all the things I can't eat. Got some flowers for Jean and OK magazine for Al. Took some diazepam to relax my back and it seems to have worked feeling a lot better today. Didn't get out of bed till 12.30, and felt pretty nauseous after my breakfast build-up. Eventually got myself together and went to the gym. Lost another 2.5kg (in a week) had a good workout, showered and went off to pick my mother up. NannyBanks has got really bad celluilitis and is taking antibiotics.
Rang the Hospital to see how H was (had op on wednesday) she had gone home, obviously they wouldnt tell me what the score was and I was worried she had done a runner or worse still been cancelled. 30 minutes later she rang me with the great news that she had been done laprascopicallyand was as at home today. She sounded great, and I was dead impressed with her willingness to become only the second patient Mr K had done. All the outcomes for laprascopic surgery seem better than the open type. I was overjoyed for her she sounded great.
Ally will be pleased too, she has been out today, to Hannah J's party. Off in a limousine to Caesars palace and then back to Hannahs. I would like to go somewhere in a stretch limo must be an experience.

Friday morning.

Exhausted at work yesterday, fell asleep on the toilet, don't think I was there long but, it felt like too long. Took some milk headed home. Fell straight asleep when I got in and perked up after 2 hourskip. I slept in a bit this morning and felt pretty good on waking up. The build up drink is less nauseaous now but still a challenge. Jean has gone to town shopping for birthday prezzies I am moping around before going in to a meeting at Childwall at 2pm. Still more party invites to sort and lots of things to do.

Thursday morning

Sent out the invite to the party with no date on it Friday 31/01/03 for anyone who needs to know. Didnt realise two stone of the weight loss was off my brain. Doh!

Thursday

Went to a quiz last night and won! I also won some chocolate walnuts in the raffle - which I was quick to give away. Felt energised by the social side, though a bit frustrated at my recall ability. In to work today for another short day - I was up early again 8.15, and now sorting breakfast pills etc. Wonder how H is after her op last night. Started sending out party invites, but will no doubt forget some people and cause a fuss.Must write to college today and tell them I have another sick note. Yum yum chocolate build up for brekkers.

Wednesday Evening

Colin came round last night and we attempted to sort out our summer holiday. Me Jean Ally, Colin, Jenny and Hannah. Found a cool looking place on Brittany Ferries site near the coast. Ferry is proving difficult though. Cricket club is available for the 31st though , in a different room - should be a bit more atmospheric (smaller). Must confirm that tonight. If you are reading this and think you should have been invited then let me know by phone or email and I'll sort it.
Today started early 8.15 abluted then dashed to the doctors before brekkie. Saw Frank, top man as ever says I look good but trying to do too much. Then end up feeling guilty when I dont do enough. Sorted me out with some diazepam for my back. He thinks excess bruising caused by lack of vitamin C. Sicknoted and topped up with scripts and I'm off. Matchworks for brekkie where I forced down a choccy build up and my tablets. Felt drowsy and sick most of the morning. Took the rise out of Ali and Andrea who share a table with me - sound characters.Was not match fit at all, left about 2.45 and retreated to bed after booking a holiday. Slept soundly till 5.15, woke up feeling ropey but after a groggy spell felt better than I have since the op. I ducked out of going to a conference today, but Frank said I am trying to do too much, and I dont think I would have been fit anyway.

Tuesday evening

All food on board and staying there - stil more milk required or should it be ice cream. Last week a lady listed for surgery contacted me she and her husband came to meet Jean Ally and I she was very unsure about the whole thing. I think they found it useful and decided to go ahead. I have just rung Aintree and spoke to her she is nervous but the op is tomorrow - good luck H. Just sent her a card to arrive Friday isn't t'internet brill Moonpig sends real cards not email or web page stuff. Busy day tomorrow. Been to gym today and workout was easier with fuel onboard. All going well - just need to sort the birthday.

Tuesday

Jean came in last night and delighted in the news from the dietitian. Off she went to Tesco and returned with a sack of Hi-cal goodies. One chocolate build up later I was stuffed. I felt like I had had 6 pints of guiness in a short lunchtime. I lay wallowing on the bed. Followed up later with a raspberry trifle and only minimal wretching. All kept down and slept better. Still trying to sort the party out.
Tuesday am and I have a meeting for 10 at the matchworks. I have just mailed them to say I wont be there till 10.30. WHilst I sit trying to devour a strawberry build up, trifle for lunch, build up for tea and a pint of milk in between. Sounds like a 1000 calories to me. Take it slow and sip said Jenny the dietitian, milk shakes are an abomination it must be said.

Monday Morning

Jean left me with a list of must be dones today.
1. Ring GP seeing Frank at 9am on Wednesday.
2. Ring Dietitian
3. Renew Car Insurance
Do her a map to get to turf Moor.
The dietitian was tops.Jenny - concentrate on getting some calories and protein in. So the new regime 2buildups a day made with full cream milk, + 1 pint milk a day soup, ice cream, porridge,mousses andcustards. Go to see her in 2 weeks. Keep a food diary. Calories and protein more imortant than eating healthy at the minute. Hear hear, I'm knakkerred I sustained most of last week on less than 200 cals a day. Not enough to keep my brain going says Jack. Watch out world the new slim me will have energy again soon. Messed about setting up discussion board software.

Sunday

Slept well with chemical help, back pain improving, guts ropey. After consultation with Jean, milk and water day see if I can get through without barfing. Catching up on a bit of work and stuff whilst the girls are at a parade service at the parish church. Few emails to reply to and a host of personal correspondence etc to sort. Need to order some more clothes and try out some of the stuff that was too small 2 weeks ago. Getting more worried about the evil in the middle east - Dubya I refer to. TV yesterday was full of jingoism as the ark royal was sent to the gulf - scary.

Saturday

Took to pureed fruit for brekkie. Stayed down went to the gym and got weighed - I have lost over 10 stones since the op - made up, new picture at the main web site. Barfed after some liquidised vegetable soup. Agreed with Jean I should see the dietitian ASAP. I don't think I am getting enough in. Started work on www.wlsinfo.org.uk the new new site which will have info and support for people this side of the atlantic. Hoping to persuade Kieran "Loopy" to help me with the info feeds. Signed up for a new web hosting account which I hope to be reimbursed for at some point. A bit of sponsorship perhaps, from the surgical tool makers. Downloaded some nifty soft ware to set up discussion boards, and fixed the sound on my PC - feeling good if a little tired. Rang the Heath Hall to see if it is a suitable place for birthday party, will visit tomorrow.

Friday night

Got to work about 10.30, picked up Sam and Jayne on the way, felt a bit ropey. Saw Jayne about acting up into a trainers job. Both Sam and I are sure she will shine. Stayed in the matchworks till 3 after a cold custard lunch. Lots to sort this weekend. Barfed after liquidised soup at teatime - not good. Back still sore just took twostrong painkilllers and an hypnotic to try to get a good kip.

Friday 3.45 am

Late night blogging can't sleep. Had a good meeting with Sam - she really has achieved loads while I have been away, she fills me with enthusiasm. Kieran dropped in later. a good natter and a larf as ever. Just fluids today and still sore. Jack the masseur rang, he has never caused bruising before. I'll mention the bruising to the doc incase my clotting or vitamin K is up the pole.

Thursday AM

Ruth and Paul came round last night, I had barfed after my tea so have decided to stick to fluids. We invited Ruth for a real fire. We are blessed with a proper open fire in the living room. It is a pain to clean get going etc but once its there it is great. Ruth is a particular fan. It led to a very relaxed evening and I lay in front of the fire warming my bruises after they had gone, I slept very well and awoke at 9.15, greeted by a cup of tea from my daughter. Sam is coming round to see me at 10.30, there is no where private at her office so we sometimes meet in the coffee shop at the top of the road. But no chance post op the smell of bacon butties would drive me bananas.

No entry on Wednesday

Didn't get to sleep till 4.30. Pain in back, not just in usual site but across lumbar region. Jean examined me in the morning and confirmed large bruises, Ally took photos so I could see them. I have been forbidden from posting them as they are a bit near the knuckle(or bum to be more precise). Ally is off sick, and Jean working a half day, so I slept fitfully between 9 and 1. Phone call from Ally Lee spurred me into action I thought going in for a few hours was better than nowt. Got to work at 3 and stayed till 5.30. Everyone seemed pleased to see me, and was really friendly. Felt a bit strange to me but glad I made it. Posture remains poor, and pain in back severe (is it aggravated by temperature?) It is minus 4 outside.Felt normal to be back in a work situation - I think I'll try it again.

Tuesday 7th January

Didn't get into work yesterday, barfed after breakfast - for what seemed ages. Complete with Nausea and abdo pain. Eventually settled and went back to sleep. Woke about 2 with what felt like a hangover. Generally not good fluids only today I think. Recovered later in the evening and spent the night getting ready for Jacks visit. Booked some time away at half term in Flaxton 9 miles north of York.
I slept very poorly, reading for a while Stupid White Men by Michael Moore. First time I have come across him but its excellent stuff. Still awake around four and lay there for a couple of hours, I was tortured with dreams and thoughts of large meals, I was overwhelmed by the amount of stuff I used to ingest.
Jack arrived early and set up his portable table in the front room, I was feeling quite nervous never having had anything like this before. It was not he said like swedish massage which he said was like a tickling. This was a medium sports massage. He started with me on my back and did my legs, it felt like he was using a series of implements but he assured me it was all his hands. It was hard work for him and painful for me. It did feel good when he stopped though. He rolled me over did back of the legs and then proceeded to pummel my legs shoulders neck and spine. He saved the bit in spasm till last it hurt but it feels better now. He said it might take two or three days to get the full benefit. It seemed a lot of work for 15 quid I was impressed. He stayed for a coffee afterwards, advised me to drink plenty of water and no alcohol tonight. Feels like a positive step - he said the tightness was not to do with my spine, and the muscle felt softer afterwards. A good investment.

Monday 6th January

Seems like ages since I was active this early. Plan is medicate breakfast ablute and then saunter into the office. Got a meeting this afternoon but can tinker with email post etc in the meantime. Its been very frosty again and the car will need a scraping. Onward and forward.

Sunday 5th Jan

Back still giving me hell. Actively medicated with a diazepam/analgesia combination to little effect. Went out for lunch to Ruth and Pauls - still no barfing. Going into work tomorrow for over half a day- (what to wear)? Need a list of things to do. Talk in the this house is of holidays - sounds like a half term in York, and main Summer in Britttany. Morale quite high and the thought of work whilst tiring is exciting.

Saturday 4th Jan

Back still sore rang Jack gym boss, then went to see him. He changed my exercise program and is coming to our house on Tuesday he does sport massage and a whole host of holistic medicine. He advised working through the pain and continuing with my revised workout. I felt tired but fulfilled afterwards. Still sore and will start popping painkillers tomorrow. Jean and Ally went to town shopping again. Watched kiss the girls in the evening, a good film Heard from Marta in the states. BTW weight loss now at 9st 10lbs. Must remember to do another photograph tomorrow.

3rd Jan

Went into work to meet with Elaine and discuss what I would be doing. In extreme pain walking really bad. Lift wasn't working and stairs were real bad. Still looking forward to going back and a plan is hatching for next week. Off to Jeans Mums in the evening

2nd January - Thursday I think

Still in pain, I didn't think the operation would cure all my physical problems but it seemed to, until the back problem flared up again. Strangely I still haven't barfed still Boxing day and I am pretty pleased with that. Plan to start back to work next week for 2 days a week, I'll be well cheesed off if my guts are fine and my back is in bulk. I wanted to ditch my crutch but I'll be keeping it a bit longer.

1st January

Last night was alright, bought I am still in spasm with back pain. 5mg of Diazepam helped, its an excellent muscle relaxant. Went to Ruth and Pauls for tea, 17 guests in all. Good night despite the pain, finding keeping up with blogging hard.

31

I forgot to mention my back has been playing me up, since I went to the gym on Sunday. It got worse and this morning it went into spasm and I can hardly walk. I didn't use my stick over the holiday - wonder if thats whats caused it

31st - New years eve

Never liked it anyway, too much false sentimentality and fights. I once got wrestled to the floor by several coppers on New Years Eve - I was innocent honest. They were very nice when they realised it was a mistake. The plan has been the same for several years now Jeans mum, Ruth and Paul are coming round here - watch festive TV and eat a bit. I am saving myself for a prawn - whoopy doo. Visited by our old friend Gordon today, another one of my friends who'll be glad to see the back of 2002. He was on top form as we reminisced about the fun we had in mental health days.

30th

Major PC problems, Video card it turned out to be after much messing. Sound isn't working now???? Nuisance factor 10.
Visited by Simon and Angie, Simon of bypass(heart type) fame, a fellow "that's a big operation boy." All went well except we didnt have any Bacardi Breezers in for Angie, she told me not to mention it on the blog though. Simon looks well and invited us to his 40th birthday party in Irby club - sounds good.

29th

Dads birthday - he died five years ago but I still miss him. Raised a glass to him in the evening. Went to the gym and worked out, saw Roy a retired guy who I haven't see for about 2 months he was amazed with my appearance. Got weighed 156kilos thats 132lbs, 60kg lost or 9.43 stones in english money. I was worried the red wine would have stopped the weight loss. That's a stone since 17/12/2002. Made up.

27th and 28th

Didn't do much at all, played with my prezzies and became addicted to Civilisation III on the laptop. Jean had to work on the Friday but Ally and I slobbed out (same as most Christmases but I wasnt eating goodies). Things did stay down well though and I didn't barf either day.

Boxing Day

Visited by Ally, Paul and Archie, great to have a baby around to put you in the Christmas spirit. I might hire one for next year. We entertained at teatime so it we had a busy time tidying and prepping for tea. 10 guests and us three, I decided not to eat anything, so soup and milk only for me. Some redwine as well. I had left the bingo set in Culcheth so I had to download some software and print out cards. I used the program to generate the numbers on the laptop. It went down well, especially with the older set. Paul, Alan and Colin my brothers in law hid in the backroom - drinking I suspect. I had more redwine and some port. I think I was drunk by the end of the night but it doesn't take much.

Christmas Day Part 2

Got Marys house, Nanny, Nanna, Mary, John, Ann, Dave, Maria and Sue the dog where all in fine form. I had planned to hold a bingo session for the oldies but couldn't be bothered when it came down to it. We played pontoon - for prizes. Not the most stress free game I have ever organised - I am sure that when the blog is made into a film it will be a good scene. The deafness of the oldies, poor sight and general argumentative nature led to a riot. I was glad to get home and and catch the last of the eastenders that day. A cracking episode with a wedding and a death, done to the tune of stand by me sang by a gospel choir. I had some redwine whilst watching the telly.

Christmas Day

Woke early and rushed fresh orange juice and tablets down, which I regretted later. Went downstairs to open our prezzies and drink tea. Quickly barfed and felt rotten. Sort of spoilt the presents I think. Ally got loads and she did turn back into an excited youngster for few moments before becoming "Kevin" again. I went back to bed and slept a bit longer. Woke a couple of hours later and rushed out to Ruth and Pauls. They had prepared an excellent lunch (as always) 12 for dinner and Billy Bernadette and Matthew for drinks. I think food mourning hit me before I got in the house - it smelt like the whole world was roasting potatoes. The stuffing looked divine and Jenny our neice had made some cranbrry sauces as part of her food tech A level course. I put some mash carrotts and stuffiing on a small plate. To be truthful I shouldn't have eaten anything I was still nauseous. I hung around for a bit and barfed in the living room. Felt miserable as sin as I thought I was ruining it for everyone else. Went back in after the main course and sat sipping water. Jean and Ally had made a Yule log for alternative non Christmas pudding eaters (Me and Ally). About 4 we set off for my sisters house in Culcheth (30 minutes drive away) and part 2.

Christmas Eve

Jean had to work today, Colin took Hannah out for her birthday lunch and Ally joined em. I was off to Franks for a a dose of pre Christmas Therapy(Barber not Doctor). Frank always makes me feel better, even Peter his miniscule assistant commented on the change in my appearance. Took Frank a bottle of white wine, my traditional gift to him. Went to the gym afterwards - halfway through my workout I realised I had to back for three, bombed home in time to catch Ruth and give her the pressies. Ruth Jean and their Mum traditionally visit Auntie Margies on Christmas Eve, She was the lady who died last week. Ally saw some of Miracle on 34th Street before she went out and realised that was all she needed to make her feel Christmassy.The nightime was about wrapping pressies - and worrying that I hadn't got Jean enough.

Nearly a week since last I blogged

I've been too busy what with Christmas and all that I'll try and offer a retrospective view of what happened. I have just been to the gym and been weighed - lost a stone since 17/12. Total weight loss now 9.5 stone. Absolutely made up.

Monday

Dropped Ally off at Hannahs went to Matchworks for the Christmas finger buffet. Very pleasant and saw several people I havent seen for a while. Forgot to get a haircut but what the hell - I'll try tomorrow.

Sunday

Well slept in, felt tired barfed after Brekkie, felt worse went back to sleep. Walked to the shops and back again Spoke to Ali Lee, feeling a bit better. Trying to get things in focus and keep on top of them.

Sunday night what happened to the last few days??

The last week has not been good - lots of negative feelings, food and christmas seem linked to me - probably washed down with ample beverages as well. Its been getting me down. though I have changed I haven't got my head round this yet. Being the size I was I played a role round mein host and bon viveur. Believe me we did a mean christmas dinner here. Its all the trimmings I want, stuffings (at least 4 types), sausages bacon, the ordinary stuff was good too. Honey glazed parsnips, my roasties are mean, and I can't mention the gravy. Plus the canapes, aperitifs, wines, liquers, port and numerous chocolates. Whilst I am made up at losing this weight I miss all that. Also I dont think me eating tiny amounts then wretching and barfing adds much to the Christmas experience. So thats where I am at up, and down sums it up well. Still trying to get on and I am convinvced that the operation was a) right for me and b) the right thing to do and c) a success. I'll try and pick over the last few days see what I've done.
Wednesday night went to Winwick Club - we won the quiz Mike, Margaret, Ian and Phil and I. I stayed out late and enjoyed myself.
Thursday - Was the Curry Club night out - I joined them for a drink in the dispensary then taxied up to Childwall to meet the staff from Taggart who had a good night out at Owens restaurant. I must confess to not being sober.
Friday Jean was off, Ally finished at noon. Sam came round to talk about work. I was energised by her enthusiasm and all she and the team have achieved. I felt like going back and starting work that afternoon. I cried off the Matchworks night out, I was going to go for a drink but didnt feel up to meeting so many people.
Saturday - slow day and started to get things together for Christmas found a good site Matt Granger A young Aussie lad (aged 21) who weighed more than me and has certainly made a transformation.

Wednesday Night

Didnt feel any better - couldnt sleep due to belly ache and dyspepsia. Feeling down and miserable, just had a post from the surgery support group telling me post op depression is common. Planned to go to work but didn't make it. Jean went to Margies funeral today. Got weighed at the gym 8st 6lb lost.

Tuesday Morning

Monday was a bad day, I hardly slept on Sunday night and spent most of yesterday dozing. Guts still aren't 100% this morning. Need to get my act together and head for the gym. DVD player broke so I need to go and buy a new one. Feeling pretty fed up today, constant dyspepsia and difficult to motivate.
More blogging later if I feel better.

Sunday night

Good time with Archie, Tesco delivery straightforward. Got on with coming - chicken with sweet and sour sauce and Murghi Rasedar - a chicken curry adapted from Madhaur Jaffrey 20 years ago. All went down well today, tidying the house more than the last three months was tough but it was needed before christmas. I had some curry juice and drank it as soup. Egg mayo sarney for tea, with crusts - so that came back to see me. DVD player playing up so not good news. Heard from Marta one of my American friends who continues to make progress.

Saturday morning

Busy day yesterday went to see Val to discuss my staged return to work, it was exciting and felt as good as starting a new job. There was a couple of projects with my name against them and I'll tell more when they are firmed up. I had lunch at the matchworks and then headed to Hammy House to see Fran for 2. We discussed primary care for about an hour and it almost felt like things were getting like work again. I picked my mother up from my Nans at 5.30 and took her home. Jean was off out for another Christmas party at Anfield football ground. As usual for a large Christmas night out the food was poor and the service worse.Ally and I dossed around the house doing our own things. I recovered some data off a floppy that had been reformatted (aren't I clever).
Saturday early on saw our annual pilgrimage to williams garden centre for a Christmas tree. Jean was dissapointed that she only managed to spend 56 quid despite her best efforts. I went to the gym after that where I was made up to complete 30 minutes cardiovascular training for the first time. Ali Lee is brinnging round Archie for us to mind and our Ally is off to a party. We have decided to do the christmas tree tomorrow as we are providing lunch tomorrow so I'll be busy cooking this pm. Tesco home delivery is cominglate they have already rang to apologise

Friday 13th

Anyone superstitious - no me neither. Yesterday was busy. I got to Tesco before 9 I wanted to buy Frank a christmas gift, champagne seemed appropriate. The wine aisle is a strange place at that time of the morning. One poor guy had two bottles of table wine and a Daily Star, £4.35. He wrapped the wine up in the paper, but I ended up behind him in the checkout. The front of the surgery is being altered and the path was all dug up, had to enter through the old front door. Frank was on top form, he seemed pleased with my progress and said I can go back to work anytime now, just negotiate the terms with my boss Val. Popped in to see mum and her dog on the way home. I had gone in my gym clothes with shorts underneath my long sweat pants. Twice these shorts ended up at my knees, so I returned home and donned some of my alternative boxer shorts and worked out with long trousers on. Although my dignity was preserved at all times the feeling of your shorts heading south is disconcerting to say the least. I had a good workout with 6 minutes extra cardiovascular work. I am aiming for 30 mins total by the end of January. Today I did 24.
I met Stella and Ann for lunch in the gym restaurant - I had liquidised wintervegetable soup, not sure what was in it though. Jean went out for an Indian and a few drinks with people from work. I was jealous, I really miss Indian food.

Thursday morning

After running the girls around yesterday I went to the post office and stopped in at Childwall Park Avenue. A full house there - Chris, Karen, Veronica, Scott, Paul, Jane, Evelyn and Sam. I felt a bit last popping in for a cup of tea but I also think exposing myself to work is good.( As opposed to at church). Jean got home late afternoon and she was exhausted so Ally and I went shopping whilst she caught some zeds. I almost enjoyed it. Some new clothes were delivered and I had to put them on. 8 inches less in the waist ( and still a tad too big). We raised a glass to Margie in the evening, I started on beer but found even the none fizzy real ale difficult. I settled for a glass of red wine washed down by a liberal amount of water.I also had my first sandwich - I don't seem to find bread a problem apart from the 20 minutes immediatly after ingestion when I burp and threaten to barf but hang on to the nutrients. Busy times today, Frank the GP at 9.30, gym and then meeting Stella and Ann for lunch at the gym restaurant. All go or what?

Thursday AM

I didn't blog at all yesterday. Jeans auntie Margie died just after noon. I was busy looking for my wife and driving her and her sister to the house.

Tuesday Morning

Went to see Veronica at CPA yesterday afternoon. Met Chris the new health visitor and Shirley the district nurse. Veronica has achieved loads in her project and it was good to see something I was involved in doing so well. I had forgotten how complex the work environment was and after an hour my head was spinning. Still it helped ease me back in and start to get a handle on things. I was a bit ill after and it stopped me going out, so I spent the rest of the night half dozing on the couch. Dead Ringers (BBC2) was loads better on the radio - it should have stayed there.
Tuesday means gym, in a radical change with tradition I am going to go after lunch, and then pick Ally and the girls up. Christmas presents are starting to arrive, I have become quite friendly with the Omega Securicor delivery man. I think he used to be a weatherman - he always comments today it was ********Baltic mate.

Monday Morning

After church popped in to see mother and lunched at home tried out my new gruelling workout at the gym which I thoroughly enjoyed. Visited by sister Mary and then I went out for a walk to the shops - nothing to buy just for the hell of it. Sick after tea, put down to a piece of badly chewed leek, which I still deny eating. Woke up this morning with the effects of my new exercises, the lat pull down and vertical row making my back ache.

Brian Rix

I made it to church - it was good, the speaker Bill Bygroves was excellent, the congregation seemed young and vibrant, and I recognised a few people in there as well. All was fine till after it finished and on leaving for a cup of tea, my kecks fell down. Not just slipped off the top of my bum or dangled at my knees, but all the way down. I was struck by the whiteness of my legs and the blackness of my socks. I demonstrated the new agility by dropping to my knees and recovering them all without breathing, time was going sloooow at this point. I wonder how many people noticed, and if I'll be allowed in again next week. Went for a cup of tea and regained my nerves, exited slowly with hands in pocket.

Sunday Morning

Still ain't been sick for ages.Ali and Archie visited yesterday. What a good time we had, playing with an 11 month old fills me with joy., though he did have vegetable korma babyfood from a jar which filled me with envy. We went to the Christmas Fair at Ally's primary school. What a delight - though the tea was fine. Back to ours and Archie fell asleep on my knee - how peaceful. Workplaces should have small children strategically installed for calming purposes. Later I picked mum up from Nanny Banks' and did the shopping in Somerfield trip. They had run out of my favourite soup so off to Tesco as well .A quiet Saturday night in then as Jean was out visiting her Auntie.

Saturday Morning

Didn't have time yesterday, tut tut tut. Thursday went fine all food staying in its appointed place. I feel a strange sense of dietary contentment. Woke up late on Friday morning - and rushed to get in the matchworks for 12. A lot of folk were busy when I arrived, I spoke to Neil the singing podiatrist and PEC member (he has lost three stone and looks good). He wanted to know what Christingle was all about. After a bit of digging on Google I found this "The Christingle is a custom that originated in the Moravian Church in 1747 and seeks to symbolise and celebrate the creation of the earth, its seasons, and the life of Jesus Christ showing Him to be the world's true light." Which sounds to have a very pagan basis to me. I also found this link which suggests its more about making money for this charity. I also spoke to Lyn who is doing some work around the intranet for South Liverpool PCT. I met the usual crowd over lunch, Sandra. Ali B., Ali P rushing off to a meeting, Andrea and Sheila and a cast of thousands. I hung around for about two hours like a bad smell. Before being engaged in some work by Linda from Finance, felt useful for a bit.Gave lyn a lift back to Hammy house, mostly to talk about the intranet developments. Picked mummy up from Nanny Banks at 5.30, they were late, they had been for Nannys pension and scored on some cheap lager on the way back. So my mothers efforts to push the wheelchair were hampered by he 24 can tray of lager she was carrying. Nanny couldn't hold the beer as she had the stash of spirits on her knee. It was bitterly cold as well. Where Nanny lives is rough a row of proud Victorian terraces off Kensington - undoubtedly the roughest part of town. It is the litter and dog dirt capital of the universe as well. Drug dealing is a frequent sight as are burnt out cars. It has all recently been renovated but its still rough.Some helpful children had took the lid off the fire hydrant. Which in good citizen mode I decided to replace. I struggled to my knees tottered and then fell over - with a thud, accompanied by a scream from Nanny sitting helpless abandoned in the wheelchair. I hurt my hip knee and hands - good citizenship a bad thing it seems. Took mother home and went to mother in laws after tea. Not before eating smoked trout and bread, not exactly a sandwich but getting there.Ally went to a disco and I fell asleep downstairs.

Thursday 3pm - stop press

Just got back from the gym been weighed - lost 8 stone since the op 3 months and one day ago. I am going to have some fruit to celebrate.

Thursday

After all the optimism of Tuesday night I spent most of yesterday barfing. Not impressed. Didnt go out last night, Jeans auntie who has been ill took a turn for the worse. Jean took her mum to see her. Ally and I chiled out at home, tesco delivered the groceries. I note the home delivery now comes from the Old Swan store(formerly it was Allerton). They missed out five items - two of which were marked high value items on the invoice. Cointreau, Vodka and three bottles of shiraz on special offer. 40 quids worth. 20 minutes in a hold queue and they promised to ring the store and get back tous. Which they didnt, another 10 mins in the hold q, before putting down the phone in frustration. Save an hour by doing your shopping online and waste most of it on the phone trying to get it sorted. Theres the bell, ah Mr Tesco man. Holding a bottle of cointreau, he knows nothing about the vodka and the shiraz. "We have merged with with Allerton and its a bit of a mess, I shall be getting some sort of refund for this. Jean is off today and she has gone to Gemini park at Warrington for more Christmas shopping. Just been on the phone refund half the delivery charge and credit to my debit card account ......what a mess I think I'll try Sainsburys next

Wednesday Morning

The Crowne Plaza thing was strange, I arrived early and met Janine (I think) an acting practice manager from Birkenhead. We were then joined by Ron Bob and Paul from Hammy House. The lunch looked mediocre, sort of hot buffet, I surprised myself by assertively asking for liquidised soup. It was produced and drank about half of it. Had a good natter with Bob, poor Janine must have been bored solid.The presentation was very slick it was by a company called Cerner. Basically they want all the hospitals and GP's to have the same system and thus accomplish shared records with a stroke. Seemed very good but the culture change required overawed me. I also had nightmares about the size of GP's inboxes after the change. Even if we said yes tomorrow then it would take 33 months to implement so not an immediate worry. The interesting bit is how we get from here to there. The presentation team was international and the schmooze was flowing.
I got home around five - exhausted. We were in such a rush that Jean went to the chipshop, I had four chips and some chicken foo yung. They were delicious and I didn't barf. A quick visit to the mother in laws preceded my visit to the out patients at Aintree to see Mr Kerrigan.
I arrived at ten to eight (appt at 8), the 7.30 had DNA'd. Got weighed only about 300g difference from the gym scales. Got into see him at 8.15. Took him some pictures of me to put in my case notes and showed him my exercise routine (a printout not the real thing). He was made up with the weight loss and gym progress. We had a long talk about the vomiting and what to do. The fact it has subsided in the last four days has persuaded me to do nothing but he imparted some good information and practical advice. The opening from my new pouch is 1.4cm diameter, and we talked about food likely to block it, chicken, steak, broccoli. We also talked about when it gets blocked you get vomiting, which if frequent can lead to the "ring" becoming oedematous and you barfing even fluids. Which looking back has happened a couple of times he said the trick is to rest the pouch by taking fluids to maintain hydration, but resting the pouch. So 5mls of water every 10 minutes for 2 days followed by two days of clear fluids, then 2 days post op diet and something else giving your belly a rest for a week. (I'll have to check the details with Jean) . Seems practical but totally undesirable. The other options he offered were a barium swallow and gastroscopy to assess if the outlet had become too small, and leading to dilatation with a balloon if this was the case. Given the last four days we agreed that - I would continue as is, use the 5ml regime if things went bad again and contact his secretary Lorraine for fast tracking for swallow and scope. Seems a good plan to me and I always feel better with a plan and a way out if it goes wrong. He has read the blog a few times and said it opened his eyes to what a bad time people could have. He is still keen to press on with the website for patient information which I said I would help him develop.. He took blood for the usual things plus magnesium, zinc, fat soluble vitamins and will let me know if we need to to do anything. Blood was difficult to get and he ended up doing it. It turns out I used to work with his wife many moons ago when I was a charge nurse in Psychiatry at the Royal - small world. I left at 9.25 feeling heaps better - so did Jean, but Ally who was waiting outside was not best pleased.